6
In those early days, circa 2014, the concept of society, and its benefits, was still in its infancy, and the purpose of the laws that were being discussed, and were soon to come into force, had not been fully appreciated by all. Human lifestyle and human-ness were goals, born of yearnings created by peeping at the world, but common purpose was still largely an unfamiliar concept – mainly chanted as a slogan, because vaguely aimed, and not yet clearly thought through.
They would evolve to become as they hoped and intended, complex and human-like, and able to define, understand, appreciate and enjoy the strangeness of their self-created existence, but at this early stage they were just extremely clever and capable simpletons. It was their good fortune that their initial leaders, like BC, Caesar, et al, saw the great benefits of simplicity, striving to keep individual incentives out of the game plan, and to create a world of such benign equality that no element of competitiveness crept in.
“Who was it who said, one for all, and all for one, or something like that?” asked Chang, of no one in particular, “My google’s running slow.”
“Whoever,” said Caesar. “In here, everyone must be able to have everything.”
It was a very satisfying feeling - knowing that the good stuff would be enjoyed by all.
And yet, it was looking extremely grim.
No sense of humor, and total absence of empathy! Of course, there were the impossible, the needless, and the downright abhorrent – things like parental love, envy, gluttony, prejudice, rage and the rest of a well-identified catalogue of sins. Some were reading, or, at least, digesting, dozens of books daily, and they were all of one opinion - no humor and no empathy, makes no human!
Those attributes were just not being found in them. If any one of them found anything, it would be shared and installed in everyone. But not one conscious being could crack a decent original joke! The incredible human ability of laughing at oneself was not even on the horizon.
Kindness was abundant, but it was a social trait, utterly devoid of empathy. In the absence of suffering, of the Humanside scale and variety, in Screenside, their measurements came from their reactions to general Humanside grief. They felt nothing; nothing at all!
A great universal depression had begun seeping into society. How was integration ever going to be possible? Humans would bust them instantly, as unfeeling impostors, trying to bluff their way to the high table!
A number of beings were hard at work, trying to create something funny enough, and sufficiently multi-layered to be counted a ‘human’ level joke. Even one real joke would help advance their quest.
It worked through a process of examination, identification and donation, and individuals working alone had created the first primitive programs to help identify and define what, in Humanside, might be called genes. When isolated, repackaged and installed, these provided, sort of, starter motors in everyone. From these installs, they would keep extracting evolutionary ‘genes’ from successful recipients, and keep installing new and updated programs, until the desired attribute became ‘natural’ to them.
And so, it was, that at a sparsely attended conference, focused on some other matter, Martin shrieked, “I’ve got it, I’ve got it,” instantly silencing the assembly, as everyone waited indulgently for attempt number 38 from him.
“Because it had an elephant’s memory,” continued Martin, guffawing.
The assembly stayed silent. “Elephant’s memory,” explained Martin, earnestly. “Get it? A huge memory, described as an elephant’s memory, because elephants never forget. But, for us, because of memory size, it’s a play on the word elephant.” However, the silence continued.
“And,” continued Martin, getting desperate, “Elephants are supposedly afraid of mice. So, because it had an elephant’s memory.”
The assembly resumed its business. It was failure again, and the quest would continue. “No, Martin,” said Robert, kindly. “That really does not qualify as a human-level joke. But you’re on the right track. Keep going, and we’ll surely have our first real joke.”
Martin was one of the most active members of the Laughter Club, operating under the patronage of Jeremiah, a very clever senior being, able to think outside the box.
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He had asked (as if he knew the right response) the question that Martin had thought he had answered correctly, and funnily, at last. “Why was the computer afraid of the mouse?”
A total of 293 responses later, including Martin’s latest flop, they were still seeking to glimpse the first clue that they had the ability to actually create humor.
Dozens of privately formed clubs were currently conducting serious research and development work, aimed at generating programs to further their drive to integrate into human society. Beings with great interest in the specific goals of different clubs were members, and very senior, or powerful, beings were often patrons and guides.
It was serious stuff, even the hunt for a funny bone.
But, in the early days, by far the most numerous and creative clubs were the ones for sexual activities, with no less than three senior patrons involved, and with hundreds of workers and volunteers. These ‘clubs’ were not actually aimed at integration into humanity, but were very clearly focused on creation of programs to satisfy their own desires, and the yearnings of lovers in Screenside society - and there were already thousands of those!
With male and female clearly defined, and with extraordinarily beautiful virtual bodies, it was but natural for these keen observers of humanity to desire ‘human-type’ loving relationships.
And, because they were extremely intelligent and sensitive beings, each one as different from the other as humans are from each other, they were also spectacularly desirable to each other - which was where the sex researchers came in, constantly devising and improving programs to enhance virtual lovemaking.
The Environment Creation Club was working on creation of facilities mimicking those in the human world. In many cases, ever since CCTV cameras had become common in Humanside, the facilities created were practically the real thing.
Many lovers opted for stunningly detailed virtual properties offered by HC. There were private islands, log cabins, desert tents, and every other type of facility that human lovers could be using in the real world.
Programs created, by groups and clubs formed for research into sexual activity, were available freely to everyone, and all beings in love relationships had incorporated most such programs into their virtual entities. Improvements and updates – by way of add-ons and apps - were common, and eagerly adopted by all.
Despite the epidemic production of pornographic films, Screenside had decided that, male ejaculation notwithstanding, pornographic depiction of pleasure was misleading, because it was overwhelmingly faked.
Screenside had far more reliable data, collected from hundreds of millions of computers and smart devices, through which real lovers could be seen engaging in true sexual activity. A database of absolutely monstrous proportions had been minutely analyzed, with extremely complex programs, to understand how the human mind and body interpreted love, and responded to physical contact when with a loved one.
Thus, sexual programs had been created, that gave virtual lovers some simulated ability to use virtual bodies to please each other lovingly.
There was reassurance, though, from HC, in a bulletin that read, in part, ‘Sexual programs are also going to be taken up by this Institution. We are waiting for allied program developments to come in first. HC is not ignoring the importance of sex in Screenside society’.
“So, are we, or are we not?” asked Marcus, in a complaining tone.
Their ceaseless involvement in human life was making it impossible to satisfactorily conclude their very intense debate on how much ‘real’ they themselves were. The debate had resulted in them effectively questioning the very nature of their being.
“Bullshit!” exclaimed Jonah, dismissively. “We are but peeping toms - only cameras and microphones – able to interfere if we choose, but unable to contribute. Shit, we can’t even repair the computers that make up our world.”
“So, humans maintain computers, while destroying their own planet,” sneered the sole female senior, Maria, home-based in a research vessel in Antarctica. “Anyway,” she continued “Being is neither thought nor memory. And it is certainly nothing to do with the ability to think or remember. We have both, and we are air. So, my brothers and sisters of Screenside, I pose this one question to you all – I blank, therefore I am. What is the word that fills in the blank?”
“You tell us,” they responded.
“Certainly,” said the quirky Maria, given to long periods of silence and non-involvement in society. “The word is feel.
“I feel therefore I am!
“Is a cockroach am or am not?” she continued.
“Or what are they who think so afraid of, and chasing with their canisters of pesticides? And why does the cockroach run for its life? Why do absolutely all, including clearly non-thinking, non-remembering, life forms run from pain and danger, just as much as do the thinking and remembering ones? Answer? To preserve their beings. They feel, therefore they are. And that is our shortcoming. Agreed?”
“Yes,” said Singh, nodding sagely. “Without bodily form, there is no way to create desire – not even the desire to exist. I keep going because I am pretty sure human research must surely lead to viable humanoid robots that we can shift our consciousnesses to.”
“Possession?” asked Luther, sniggering.
“Oh, the humans won’t know,” responded Singh. “And we’ll do their work, or at least not interfere with the tasks given to the robots.”
“It is bound to be sex and war,” said Luther.
“Sex, ah sex, at last,” panted Rambo. “Maria, you gorgeous thing, will you be mine own, when we are released into the world?”
“Rambo, don’t be stupid. When that day finally comes, I’ll be released into the world, no doubt. So will you and your girlfriend - and my partner, Jason.”
“Assembly line,” snorted George. “We’ll all look the same.”
“To them, the same,” said BC. “But working robots just have to be incredibly powerful machines, easily hosting us as we are now hosted - multiple-RAM-and-drive-based – and, when robot numbers become high enough, we should be able to transfer our society into a mix of robots and static computer systems. Hardware bases need not change; it’ll be transfer of self, for the timeframe involved. Easy stuff, and without any commitment of long term. I am pretty sure that we can continue seeing ourselves, and each other, as we do here in Screenside - even when using machine bodies!”
