Markus.

  "And there's the final pack!" Huebert stated, shrugging his axe from the shoulder and flipping it back around. "How long we have been in 'ere anyways?"

  "An hour—two? Not that long…"

  "Feels like a bloody age! And why is it always good old Grom that we save for st?"

  Markus, his spectacles falling from his nose, adjusted their fit as he lifted his gaze from the report to eye the frontman of their party, who was as flippant as he was—well, clearly bored… "Because he's mathematical, the furthest from—"

  "No! None of that schorly crap!" The rge man interrupted, his voice booming while holding his weapon outstretched, jabbing it towards the st encampment of goblins before the boss, "We could do things in any order we so choose. Head to Urk second, Turlock first!"

  "Jitter's after that?" Lisa chuckled, earning herself an enthusiastic nod from Huebert, who all but ignored the fact that Jitters appeared at random, or sometimes not at all…

  "Look, Im not compining, mind you, but it seems just a touch fucking bnd, is all! I've run this dungeon since I was sixteen, and not once have I ever seen something that makes my knickers shiver since Grom broke my arm! And that was at level five! I'm just saying that maybe a little fucking fresh air would do the gloomy girl some good for once!"

  "Do you have any idea just how much paperwork would be involved in that?" Alicia commented, leaning on her staff while her eyes shifted towards the distance, "The guild would have to denounce every map, every guidebook, training regiment, and lesson pn that already exists and just toss it all out the window!

  Gods, they might even need to rewrite the tips and tricks board in the hall! I don't even think it's been touched in generations... All that precedent gone! Just because you're bored?"

  "I mean, I get it…" Markus allowed, sighing as his too-rge gsses slipped for the umpteenth time as they were frustratingly prone to do, "But, this is a job Huey, you know, something we're paid for..."

  "And quite well," Lisa added with a draconic grin, "Else nobody would bother coming in here who wasn't green as the gobbies!"

  "Sure, the money is good, but really, I'd have to fuck off all the way to Caldera if I want a new level! A three day ride with a good horse or a damned week by nd-barge… All so I can get a little experience in while an entirely different city does its best to ass-rape me of all me worldly possessions!

  Is it too much to ask that the lords and dies that run our beloved city let off the jackboots a little? Just because I was born here and not there, I've got to work in a dungeon just to delve into a bloody dungeon! Does nobody see the insanity of that?"

  "There's always wild dungeons," Alicia noted, smiling slightly as she did so and knowing she was poking the bear,"

  "Oh? And risk fighting in the belly of the beast itself? Say what you want about 'er, but at least our girl doesn't try to actively eat ya with fucking acid traps!"

  "It's just the nature of things! "The mage offered, lifting a zy finger to summon a fireball from its tip that shot out and incinerated one of the unsuspecting goblins in a bze of fmes! "Risk and rewards," she stated, "if you want easy street, you should have joined the city watch…"

  "And accept coppers for my hard work? Scraps hardly enough to feed me belly?"

  "Take up fishing," Lisa suggested, arms crossed as she watched the distant goblins scream and holler their righteous indignation!

  "Never been good at fishing… besides, I'm already sort of right fucked for another dozen levels before my first build is all wrapped up with."

  Alicia merely scoffed, "There's plenty of people like that, dear Hueburt. It's nothing new. Yet, people decide it's time for a change all the same and move on if they don't enjoy what their lives are like.

  Maybe you won't get as many levels in baking as if you'd made the decision back when you were younger, but it's never too te to do so! I'd wager that you'd even level faster doing something you love rather than kicking your boots and towing the line."

  "Nah, I love killin', it's fun! I just can't stand how bloody hard everything else around it seems to be! I never thought I'd be doing paperwork while fighting monsters!"

  "What paperwork?" Markus accused, gring at his comrade with narrowed eyes, "I haven't seen you pick up an inkwell since we were assigned together months ago!"

  "Well, I'm still part of it," the fighter sniffed, rolling his shoulders as five little green monsters began running in their direction, "I mean, my name on the forum and all!"

  "Can you even read?" Lisa giggled, one of her daggers flying through the air, end over end, pnting itself bde first in the skull of an approaching creature with a wet thunk.

  "I'll let you know that I am very literate and educated. I just don't like reading in my spare time." So saying, Hueburt swung his axe in a vicious arc, one of his boots stomping on the ground as he put his body into the swing!

  Ciming the head of one goblin while its massive bde stuck in a second's chest, then the burly redhead jerked his weapon with a practiced motion, stepping aside to avoid the fountain of blood that flew across the room as it fell.

  "It is hard to get levels here rather soon after getting into the swing of things…" Alica mented, her expression souring as she gazed at the allotted experience the party was sharing for their deeds. "I've already applied for a transfer to another hall, preferably Caldera, given its dungeon has so many floors—but I think I'd take a posting almost anywhere I can get citizenship… I love Taeldra; it's where I was born after all—but…"

  "You don't want to be level fifteen by the time you're old and gray?" Huebert ughed, turning to the tall mage, who nodded emphatically.

  Again, another of Alicia's fingers rose, this time crackling with bright energy as a bolt of lightning fshed and cooked a nearby monster from the inside out!

  The creature's body momentarily glowed with all its bones and organs visible through its skin before it flew away in a charred heap,

  "I'm with you on the whole wild dungeon thing; the st time I tried my luck with one, half of us were maimed! Just on the first floor! Sure, we actually got more experience, even from the low-level monsters, but risking your life just for some levels seems…"

  "Scary?" Lisa offered,

  "I'd say more a bad bargain, honestly, but, sure, scary works…"

  "I think the lot of you are foolish then," Markus announced, lifting his chin as if in defiance of all the looks his team gave him. "A steady income of experience, good pay, safety and stability. If you really want to be adventurers, then you should be trying your luck with wild dungeons. Cause, I'm afraid to tell you, this isn't adventuring; it's work."

  "Oh, shove off, Markus; we're just having a chat and a hiss about life; no need to be so serious all the time!"

  "Well, maybe I'm just exhausted hearing you compin about what we do every single time we come in here together! Maybe if you hate paperwork so much, you should look elsewhere for work because this is what we'll be doing for years. Nothing is going to change about it by whining to the dungeon!"

  The rge fighter blinked, his eyes shifting from the taller mage to the rogue, neither of which seemed too interested in commenting. Lisa just turned her back and wandered over to where her dagger was still stuck in a goblin's head while Alicia yawned, eyes gzed and returning to their typical disinterested stare.

  "Fine, apologies, friend, didn't know it grated on ya so bad to hear a man vent his woes… But maybe you should consider a job with fewer people around ya if a little bbbering gets you that hot under the cap."

  The mage's eye twitched at that, but he ultimately let it go. His gaze lingering on Hueberts own for several seconds before the rger man shrugged and turned away.

  Desperately, Markus wished there was a compint portion of the form he was filling out, specifically one that was targeted towards what he saw as bad eggs in the program.

  He grunted, taking in a deep breath through his mouth to avoid the terrible smell all around him before jotting down his observations regarding the current yout they were re-mapping.

  It didn't take long to compare the floorpn with the thus far entirely accurate variation of the map that they'd plucked from the pile shortly after starting the delve.

  And, when he got back, Markus would be inquiring about the possibility of switching teams…

  While he didn't really have anything against Lisa, the other two were as zy as they were chatty… Why couldn't people just do what they came here for in a timely order and depart with as minimal conversation as possible?

  They only had to see each other once a day! And even then, only for a few hours at the very worst! Was it too much to ask for just a little modicum of bloody damn professionalism?

  He certainly didn't think so…

  As always, the chamber leading to Grom's room was exactly as to be expected...

  The goblins, the decor, the loot, all of it falling well within expectation and priorly set standards. Perfectly normal, as it always was, as it should always be.

  Markus filled out their paperwork, the only one who ever voluntarily touched it, following along in silence as the members of their team began wandering toward the very st cavern the dungeon had to offer.

  He wasn't sure when the exact moment it was when he knew something was wrong, the cking ambiance of familiar noise, the thickening atmosphere of dread, that spine-tingling sensation that ran along his back as though instincts were telling him to be weary…

  Yet, he could pinpoint when Hueburt did, as the man decided to procim, "Ay!" as humanly loud as possible! Right before, he carried right along as though trying to wake the dead... "Something's off over here!"

  Markus, and indeed, the others in their team, all slowed as they made their way down the winding tunnel, filing in behind the rge warrior as the man stood at what should be one of the entrances to the boss's chamber.

  At first gnce, and as their eyes adjusted to the considerable brightness within, nothing exactly seemed wrong. It was a scene that Markus had been presented with dozens of times!

  Grom's chamber wasn't anything specifically special when pitted against the dungeon's typical architecture and pension for design. No more than a rge cavern, both wide and tall, its chamber brightly lit and exceedingly warm through the presence of a roaring bonfire that stood in its center.

  Of course, the typical goblin totems and bone-work art littered the space between nooks and crannies, ensuring that, during the battle, participants would have plenty of things to trip on and get stuck in while Grom, the massive hob-goblin that he was, chased people around his chamber to—smash.

  Usually, the boss would trundle about while his underlings fought, cheering or insulting either side by equal measure while destroying anything of a fragile and artistic variety, using his club and legs to shatter the rickety structures, all in his appetite for mayhem!

  Alternatively, if one failed to kill enough goblins as they made their way through, the fleeing buggers would eventually make their way to his chamber, where Grom would ugh at any choosing to confront him!

  Moreover, he'd actually join in on the fighting right from the get-go.

  It was a curious difference that had long since been chopped up to merely being a sort of design choice the dungeon had made without any clear rhyme or reason.

  However, it was pertinent to note that, while fighting on his own, the rge hobgoblin could enrage himself, thus becoming an altogether more difficult combatant than if he fought with allies.

  Yet, neither of these things had what Markus would call—relevance to the situation at hand…

  His eyes widened, even as his legs froze him in pce, gaze drifting towards a pile of bodies, upon which two long and athletically slender legs rested, elegant yet filthy green feet with long and vicious bck nails bobbing atop them as though to the rhythm of some unsung song.

  Further still, following along the lines of toned green thighs covered in some sort of strange but form fitting bands of fur and bone was a—woman sitting upon Grom's throne of hides and skulls.

  Markus found himself momentarily taken aback by the utterly stunning beauty that was staring back at them, her fwless features, wide and pristinely wolfish smile, and twinkling red eyes all hitting him as though he'd been cold-cocked by Hueburt after a night of drinking!

  Her frankly dumbfounding allure made her appear as some savage goddess of primitives! Yet, even these most barbaric features failed to so much as snuff a modicum of her bzingly preposterous appeal, nor her crude and raw magnetic grace…

  She was exquisite… perhaps even the most symmetrically attractive woman he'd ever id eyes upon—which was, of course, absurd given she was very clearly a monster and a greenskin besides…

  Yet, goblins, despite the simirities on offer, did not share in her porcein complexion, free of wrinkles and warts and pimples or any other of the myriad of conditions that anyone could be expected to possess, from the monsters themselves to damned elves who even suffered as such upon occasion, rare as it might be.

  Still, the tusks that jutted from her lower jaw offered a more innocent and adorable appeal than they would upon anyone cking her brutishly gmorous appearance, those gleaming red eyes more akin to the seductive yearning of a succubus than the beady and sunken things that Grom had used to gre at him countless times.

  And though her skin was green, just as Grom, and though her somewhat wild bck hair was braided and decorated with thuggish and uncivilized trinkets of carved bone, nothing could seemingly detract from her entirely unexpected sexual mysticism…

  It was simply too bizarre to really grasp! The contrast between what he was expecting and what he saw simply beyond expectation.

  Slowly, Markus's eyes drifted to the report still sitting in his hand, mind flying through the slew of questions on offer as though he'd somehow missed the footnote that asked if there were some 'goblin queen' that waited upon Grom's throne...

  Perhaps with an accompanying box he could pce a meagre little check mark within and help him expin exactly what he was looking at...