CHAPTER NINE

  I would much rather they refrained from waking me up in this manner. For one thing, it really is rather jarring. And for another, who knows, I might just get used to it.

  For the second time that day, Richard was dragged from his cultivation trance by the terrified shrieks of small children. Opening his eyes with a sigh, he expected to be greeted by some form of harmless novelty, or else something equally mundane.

  Perhaps a dastardly garden gnome, or an especially voracious gummy worm?

  What he had not at all been expecting was a seven meter tall stuffed rabbit in overalls, swinging a rusty hook around on silver chain—easily decapitating the top halves of trees by the dozen for every missed pass it made at the soon to be mothers scurrying at its feet.

  What in gods name is going on here?! What on earth did I miss?!

  Even as he watched, the pink giant retracted its hook from where it’d buried itself into the forest floor—narrowly missing a sprinting Marlene as it plowed a straight furrow before leaping from the ground. Soaring through the air on momentum alone, before it begin spinning around the monster’s long eared head in disturbing facsimile of a lasso. And that was when he saw the monster’s description.

  +—|-BENNY THE BUNNY BEHEMOTH-|—+

  ?[Lvl 7 ELITE]?

  He genuinely could not believe his eyes.

  What-?! How-!?

  Not only was it a lvl 7 Elite, but it was a named monster as well?! He genuinely could not wrap his head around its presence, here, in the super easy tutorial! Until, that is, he caught sight of the main objective.

  Main Objective: Survive the Bosses Wrath for 15 minutes.

  Ahh, so that’s how it is.

  They weren’t meant to kill the Elite, merely survive long enough for it to, what? Leave of its own accord? Hmm. Most likely.

  It’d long since been verified that tutorial difficulty did not merely increase or decrease things like monster health, damage, and the rewards on offer, but it also affected monster sentience as well. It wasn’t unheard of for a monster in easy mode, for instance, to follow highly telegraphed and often repetitive patterns. Meanwhile, as had been his experience in the Hard Mode tutorial, in higher difficulties, they went from mindless mobs, to living, thinking beings—intelligent, ruthless, and with a keen interest in staying alive.

  Ultimately making the difference between a Lvl 7 Elite in Easy Mode and a Lvl 7 Elite in Hell Mode like night and day. Even still, dumbed down or not, with the advent of a named Elite…

  This… this changes everything.

  With this, a genuine run at Devil’s Arcadia wouldn’t just be guaranteed, there was a good chance he’d stand at the very pinnacle of power once he got there.

  Without a shadow of a doubt he needed to kill that monster. And he needed to do it, preferably, before time ran out.

  Time Remaining: 1:35

  The only problem with that plan being… his complete and total helplessness.

  Foiled again by this accursed meat prison… Why goddess Opon? Why hath thou forsaken me?

  And this wasn’t just him being overly dramatic, either.

  There were choice benefits to slaying a named monster, after all. Benefits that didn’t just go away because you were in Super Easy Mode.

  Or so he hoped.

  Now all he had to figure out was how? He’d need to get a lot closer if he wanted any attack he made to reach. Meaning there just had to be a way for him to become mobile, even if only temporarily. A method he could use. Some untapped resource he could leverage. An obedient mule eager to be ridden…

  Richard paused.

  He looked down at the tiny arms, like iron bands really, wrapped around his middle. Then up at the frightened childre- that is to say, brave young adventurers currently huddling around him.

  Incredulous that he hadn’t thought of such an elegant solution sooner, Richard—feeling like the smartest infant in the whole wide world—smirked.

  +++

  Alice felt a light tug on her sleeve.

  Glad for any excuse to look away, she turned her gaze from the mean bunny man and his scary hook chain. Feeling an almost palpable sense of relief as she did so.

  Turning her full attention onto her little bro—she’d always wanted a little brother, after all, and she was sure daddy would pay to get him adopted if she asked—she couldn’t help but squeeze his cheeks, give him all the hugs, and smoosh her face against his until the friction started to burn. Entirely unaware that this wasn’t exactly endearing her to the boy, nor that what she was really doing was relieving some of the lingering stress and anxiety that’d built up over time.

  Eventually, she relented. Remembering, for the first time, that it had actually been him to initiate this time around, where normally he just pretended as if she didn’t even exist. Wait! But didn’t that mean they were finally becoming close?! Like real brother and sister?! Oh, she just knew she’d win him over eventually! And all she’d really had to do was make sure they were never separated, for any reason, ever. It was no wonder he’d finally seen things her way!

  Five year old Alice bobbed her head up and down, in awe of her own sage wisdom.

  “Something I can help you with little bro?” she thought she managed not to sound too smug.

  Her little bro’s face scrunched up into a scowl, probably trying to hold back tears of joy, before he raised one little fist, the effort of it clearly taking its toll. Alice’s eyes followed the little appendage, as if transfixed. He pointed to the mean bunny man. Then to himself. And finally made a spitting motion. Drool spilling out to dribble down his chin as he gave her a fierce, triumphant smirk, then raised a shaky thumbs up.

  Reading on this site? This novel is published elsewhere. Support the author by seeking out the original.

  Alice, for her part, was so ecstatic in that moment, she might as well have had little stars shining in her eyes.

  +++

  Robin ducked, narrowly avoiding the length of chain as it whizzed by overhead. The very same rattling pseudo-projectile that went on to deforest a good chunk of the receding tree line in seconds, like a farmer reaping his harvest. She very carefully did not think about what a blow like that would’ve done to her neck had she failed to duck in time.

  “Behind you!” the others called in unison, as had become something of a tradition by this point.

  Seeing as the hook and chain combo, on its return trip, was often just as deadly, if not more so. Honestly, the fact that they hadn’t yet lost anyone to this madness was nothing so much as a miracle.

  Current Number of Casualties: (0/13)

  Time Remaining: 0:59

  Seeing the chain go taught, and feeling that telltale rumble as the massive hook plowed its way through root and soil, Robin knew her time was running out.

  “To the left!”

  Knowing they likely meant their left, her right, Robin took a gamble, and leapt to the side. Digging her shoulder painfully into the earth in the resulting tumble, she was somewhat gratified to see the rusty hook lance through where her torso had been only moments before.

  Hook flying unerringly to slap into the monster’s furry palm, eliciting barely a sound, before he set it to spinning once more. The whir whir whir, growing in pitch and intensity. From experience they knew they’d have around six seconds before he sent out the next devastating attack. Luckily it hadn’t deviated from this routine, nor moved an inch from where it now stood, since this “second phase” had begun.

  Otherwise they might really have been in trouble.

  Robin counted off the seconds in her head.

  One Mississippi. Two Mississippi.

  “CHAAAARRGE!!!”

  Huh?!

  Snapping her head towards the sound, she felt her jaw slacken in dumbfounded stupefaction. Instead of staying put, where they’d have been safe, for some asinine reason the children had decided to… yes, her eyes weren’t deceiving her. They were charging towards the boss monster! What in the world did they think they were doing! There was Alice, near the front, Jimmy and Donald near the rear, forming something of a V formation. And on top? Somehow supported by all three kids simultaneously, was their as yet unnamed one month old infant.

  Together, with the rest of the kids, they led an unbalanced, drunkenly veering charge.

  A choice few of the kids, without any designated task, deciding to race along to the sides of this jolly procession. Waving their arms about wildly and shouting at the top of their lungs. There was Chance and Sanya. Skye’s involvement was no surprise. In fact this entire endeavor was probably her idea. What did, surprise, however was quiet little infant bundled up tightly in Skye’s arms.

  Seriously, what in the world were they trying to accomplish? To get themselves killed? To give her a heart attack? And while sure, there was barely a minute left before the allotted fifteen minutes were up, there were a scant few seconds left before Big Ben let loose with one of his signature swings. Robin watched in horror as it turned its gaze towards the hollering children—its body shifting toward the “incoming threat.”

  She felt her blood run cold.

  Robin briefly locked eyes with Denise, way over on the other end of the clearing. The same helplessness she felt mirrored in the woman’s expression. They weren’t going to make it in time.

  Four Mississippi. Five Mississippi…

  Her heart was nearly pounding out of her chest. She began moving forward, shouting, gesticulating wildly, knowing, in her heart, she would be too late. The monster let it’s chain spin through its final revolutions, before shifting its stance, and making ready to throw…!

  Something small and thin flickered past, almost too fast for her to see.

  And then, the bunny rabbit’s head exploded in a rush of matted fur and cotton fluff. It’s chain was released prematurely, arcing over their heads, over the tree crowns besides, to come crashing down somewhere deeper in the forest. The big Bunny Behemoth staggered. Straightened. Maintained its footing for several long seconds, before it toppled, fell, landing flat on its back.

  Dead.

  There followed a moment of perfect silence. A silence that was quickly shattered by five overlapping cheers, voices raised in shrill triumph.

  +++

  ?-|—(You have slain an enemy: BENNY THE BUNNY BEHEMOTH [Lvl 7 ELITE])—|-?

  Experience Gained. Bonus Experience Gained for Slaying a Monster Elite. Participation Points Gained. Bonus Participation Points Gained for Slaying a Monster Elite.

  [+140 Participation Points]

  *DING!*

  ?-|—You Have Gained A Level. You Are Now [Lvl 1]—|-?

  [+2 free points]

  Richard waited. Blinked.

  Wait! I… I don’t believe this! Are you telling me that’s it?!

  He slays a named Elite, seven levels higher than him, at lvl 0, in a single blow no less, and all he gets is one measly level?! Suddenly the full extent of his monumental disadvantages as a talentless individual, hammered home like it never had before. Thankfully, even if his leveling talent was abysmal, there were certain aspects of the system, and the tutorial, entirely divorced from things like “natural born talent.”

  *DING!*

  ?—Achievement Earned!—?

  Slay a Named Elite Monster at least Five Levels Above You.

  For Achieving Such a Remarkable Feat, You Have Been Granted a Title!

  +-|—[Mighty Monster Slayer (I)]—|-+

  (Passive effect: you have a general sense for the location of elite monsters, both named and regular.)

  (Active Effect: When in the presence of an Elite, the users strength and regeneration parameters are increased by 25% (Lasts for 3 Seconds. Cooldown: 3 hours.))

  Excellent!

  While the active was so so, the passive was basically a necessity for higher level play among high rankers—when the reality of merciless ability grind they all had to look forward to fully sank in—as slaying elite monsters was by far the best, if not only way, to reliably gain abilities for further evolution. There were two more versions of the title: Mighty Monster Slayer (II) and Mighty Monster Slayer (III) respectively. Each adding better specificity and range to the passive, until an apex Mighty Hunter could accurately sense a Named Elite from several kilometers away.

  The one he had right now was not nearly as good, with a range of a couple hundred feet at best, and only giving a general idea of where the monster is, but he most certainly wasn’t complaining. There would be time to upgrade later.

  Great though the title might be, this was not why he absolutely needed to kill that monster. To understand why it was such an absolute necessity, however, one needed a quick refresher on the nature of lvl 0 individuals.

  Contrary to many expectations, very rarely was a person, freshly initiated into the system, actually rated at lvl 0.

  Normally reserved for people with chronic illnesses, lifelong disabilities, or else those literally on their dying deathbeds, only a small fraction of earth’s population could be considered, by the system, to be lvl 0. And of these people, very few of them actually make it past integration. Ultimately passing during the extremely taxing operation, in which the system engraves one’s Master Formation onto one’s soul. Of those few, even fewer survive the tutorial. And of that minuscule number, even fewer actually make a name for themselves.

  For the longest time, there was very little known of these chosen few. In fact, of the thirteen high rankers initially rated at lvl 0 in his timeline, no one even knew they’d been any different until much, much later, when certain truths eventually came to light about their origins.

  And in turn, what a lvl 0 received by doing the impossible.

  By achieving something not even the most hearty of level one’s were likely to achieve. Something deemed truly notable by the system. The advantage of being born on the very bottom of the totem pole, and somehow clawing your way to the top.

  *DING!*

  ?-|—A Grand Feat Has Been Achieved!—|-?

  For Achieving a Grand Feat, You Have Been Granted Access to the Grand Paths System.

  Because You are the First Person From Your World to Be Granted Access to the Grand Paths System, Any Path You Pick Will Received a Boost in Potency.

  ***BE WARNED***

  Any Path You Take Will Be Permanent. You Cannot Take It Back.

  Now, Choose the Path You Seek to Walk & Remember to Choose Wisely.

  After reading the achievement, Richard couldn’t seem to get the silly grin off his face.