A longboat landed on the beach of an island with lush green grass growing out of fine black sand with the Monster Mashers stretching and stepping off. Lisa was no longer with them as she had stayed behind in Nidavellir. Racknar talked with the boatmaster for a bit before addressing the party. “So according to the boatmaster the palace of the High King of Skald is on the largest central island of this archipelago. We have to walk and boat our way there. Or rather we would have had to walk if it wasn't for the Badge of Arachne allowing me to summon spiders for us to ride. However, to conserve resources I'll only summon three. Davy and Krys'tal can share.”
Marionette tilted her head. “Okay, so who's getting a spider to themselves?” Racknar let out a soft growl. “I am of course. I'm too heavy to risk adding more additional weight onto the spider.” Racknar quickly summons the spiders and the party starts making its way to the capital of the nation. They crossed the small island tapping the one gate there before reaching the end and having to cross water to get to the next island. Rather than build a bridge the people of Skald used small boats to ferry people from one island to the other.
They island hopped and touched gates until they reached the largest island in the archipelago and were finally on their way to the capital proper. From the random traffic the kingdom was predominantly human, but didn't outright reject other races as a number of different beast-kin roed the streets. Everyone gave the party off looks but said nothing. Though definitely not an everyday sight, seeing unusual things like this probably wasn't uncommon due to how strange adventurers can be.
The capital city itself wasn't exactly as expected. Many villages the party passed were made fairly simply out of stone and wood looking like old fashioned cabins but the city itself used what looked like large wooden steaks to make the outer wall like one would expect to see from a goblin or Ork settlement. Upon closer inspection the wooden log steps were cut in half and placed on the two sides of the wall that was likely made of stone as Racknar could see people walking on the wall and once closer hear their footsteps. They arrived at the large wooden door where they showed their adventurers licenses and were allowed in.
Davy looked around the inside at the stone and wood cabin buildings inside the city. “You know it's strange how much people trust adventurers even from other nations.” Racknar nodded. “The guild has clear rules, ones we've technically violated. Guild members aren't supposed to involve themselves in political matters. Sending messages from one kingdom to another is fine but you're not supposed to act as a diplomat or participate in wars. They are basically mercenaries that exclusively hunt monsters and clear out ruins. It saves the nation's manpower so they aren't using guards and military to deal with it.”
Ariagoria added to what Racknar is saying. “It also helps that bad actors tend to get their licenses revoked and bounties put on their heads. Misuse your status or break the rules and things can get very bad for you considering it's a global organization. Anyway… what's the plan here?” Racknar gestured to the large log cabin with a wooden foundation at the center of the city. “Well the Skald seems to be a translocation of Scandinavian culture with Vikings included much like how Midterranus is the Greek city states. As such there are a few things they value. Strength, death by combat, ability to hold alcohol… They live life to the fullest knowing any day could be their last.”
Davy nodded. “They also have the drake riders. Outside of what Da Vinci is building, the Skald have the best airforce in the world. Composed of dragon riding Viking warriors who aren't afraid to die. Combined with the longboats able to give even the Royal Bramble Navy a run for its money and it's easy to see how they stalemated the Empire that most definitely over extended its armed forces. They've been trying to subjugate Skald and Midterranus for a while but haven't gained any ground in either. Granted they were only using the military of the closest nation.”
Marionette rubbed her chin. “So they never bothered to unify the armies of multiple nations. Why do you expect them to do so for Bramble?” Racknar growled lightly. “Because it's one thing to be in a soft stalemate, another to lose ground you already had. If the kingdoms weren't human the Empire probably would try harder. They don't want to wipe these nations out, but convert them.” Ariagoria nodded. “The only thing keeping them from the beast-kin kingdom is a human one between the Empire and it. One that's mostly sand.”
The party approached the stone and log palace. “Anyway, let's focus on how we'll convince the high king to sign into an alliance.” Racknar addressed the palace guards and explained the situation. Snow started falling from the sky as he talked, explaining the current situation of Bramble and their diplomatic mission. The party was escorted in with guards keeping an eye on them as they were brought to the throne room.
The throne was carved from wood, the back much taller than it needed to be, at the throne a woman sat holding a crown made of fused dragon bones in her lap. “You came all this way to see my husband, unfortunately that is no longer possible. His life was ended by an assassin who used the true death spell as an enchantment on his dagger. Most likely from the Obsidian Order of the Church. You should consider yourself lucky I don't kill you on sight Imperial scum. The audacity to assassinate our kind then send a diplomatic delegation.”
Racknar reached out his hand. “Actually I am here on behalf of independent Bramble. The new queen sent a letter of intent shortly after the old king died. This was weeks ago.” The queen sat up a bit and put her hand to her chin. “I sense no deception from you, but you must admit the timing is unfortunate.” Racknar hummed. “Maybe the Empire foresaw that we'd seek out allies in their enemies? That's unfortunate. Especially considering how your government works. Unlike the kingdoms of the Empire where you or the eldest child would rule, the Jarls will vote for a new high king. Until then you can't make any decisions that affect the entire kingdom.”
The queen nodded. “The Jarls will meet here tonight. If you are willing to wait, we can bring the matter up to them. But first, a quick test of your character and perception. From this first meeting, what do you think of me?” Racknar looked at the queen, dressed in winter fur. These furs weren't a display of finery but were a display of practicality. Armor meant to battle in winter, not to be a show of wealth. It was entirely possible she hunted the animals herself considering the culture. Her body language was firm, commanding. She had the demeanor of a strong leader.
The woman wasn't young, but her hair had hardly any grey in it, braided perfectly in a traditional manner and decorated with small bones. Her face and expression were serious, but there was also a softness behind her eyes. Tough, but not without mercy. Racknar cleared his throat. “I see both strength and beauty. The heart of a warrior, a queen, a mother. Someone who has a firm hand but is not without mercy.” The woman shuffled on her throne. “Beauty? Are you trying to flatter me?” Racknar shook his head. “I speak only honestly. Also there are many kinds of beauty, not just the physical kind. Although… have no doubt that under that fur is the body of a woman who has spent her life training and refining it.”
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The queen stood up. “I see. I'll arrange for a room and you'll be summoned when the other Jarls arrive.” She gestured to the side. This man will help you get settled.” A man covered in fur and hide armor led them to a humble room. “I'll return when you are summoned.” He then leaves the group in the large room with several beds. Likely a barracks room for guards. Racknar sat on a bed. “So a tiny snag but things seem to be going smoothly despite them.” Marionette crossed her arms. “So are you trying to seduce the queen or something? Is that your strategy?” Racknar shook his head. “I was just speaking honestly. I'm not trying to do anything other than get through this. Honestly I was expecting to have a drinking contest with the high king.”
Ariagoria gave Marionette a pat on the shoulder. “Don't get worked up, you know how Racknar is. If someone asks if he finds them physically attractive he'll answer honestly. However you and I both know that him finding someone physically attractive isn't enough for him to consider pursuing them.” Racknar nodded and laid on the bed. “Hopefully we can convince the Jarls that an alliance is a good idea. Depending on how much of a grudge they might hold against the Bramble Navy. They sank a number of longboats over the years.”
Davy ran a hand through his face tendrils. “Yeah, there's some baggage here unlike the previous kingdom. At least with our experience with Ackeron a letter was all it took for them to go to bat for us with the other city states. Here we have almost the opposite problem. The previous reputation makes things an uphill battle.” The group sat around talking until that guy came back to lead them to the meeting room. A long table with a feast set at it with the various Jarls sitting around it and snacking. “This feels like a waste of time. We all know who among us is the best fit to be the next high king. Hrold was weak, as evidenced by him dying in his sleep like a coward.”
The queen slammed her fist on the table. “He was killed by an assassin, not by an illness. The Obsidian Order are basically demigods of stealth. I doubt anyone in this room could have avoided the dagger.” Racknar looked away. He knew a number of trucks and combinations of magics that would have saved the king but saying so now wasn't the best idea. The rude man took a big bite of turkey leg before gesturing to the Monster Mashers. “And who the hell are these outsiders?!” The queen gestured to the group. “Diplomats from Bramble. King William has died and the kingdom is under new management. Their new queen has not only stopped hostile action but has offered reparations in exchange for an alliance as they fight for independence from the Empire.”
The man gestured with the half-eaten turkey leg. “Seriously? You have any idea how many of my men have died, how many of my longboats were sunk, because of that damned royal navy. The only thing that kept them at bay were the dragon calvary since all they have are griffins and pegasi. If we only had to deal with Bramble and not the entire Empire-” Racknar interrupted. “You have been dealing with only Bramble. They received no aid from the rest of the Empire. We pulled back two weeks ago and you didn't press the advantage. That suggests you already had an internal struggle before we pulled back and before your king died. You think you could run this country better? You couldn't even run the distance from your seat to my feet without falling on your face.”
The man placed his food on the table before slamming his hands on it and pointing angrily at Racknar. “How dare you, outsider. I ought to kick your ass right here!” Racknar stretched out his arms. “I welcome you to try.” The man stomped forward. Racknar clenched his right hand and the man tripped and landed on his face. Racknar chuckled. “Looks like someone was pre-game drinking.” The man slammed his fist on the floor before getting up. “What magic is this? You tripped me somehow! I fell after you made a fist!”
Racknar shook his head. “This is the first time I've entered this room so I didn't set a trap, also I'm no magic user. You tripped all on your own. Probably because you can't handle your mead.” The man pointed angrily. “I could drink you under the table.” Racknar glared at the man giving him the side eye. “There's not a single person in this room that could drink me under the table.” The queen leans forward. “How about we forgo the usual voting and have a drinking contest. The Jarl that lasts the longest gets to be high king. If the outsider beats all of us he gets his alliance and to choose who he'd rather deal with among us.”
The man returned to the table and cleared a spot. “You had me at drinking contest! Let's get the horns out already.” A woman starts handing out drinks to everyone at the table plus Racknar who winked at Marionette. “This is going to be a cakewalk.” Racknar was handed a drinking horn and a lady stood at his side ready to refill it. Racknar raised his horn. “May the best individual win.” Everyone started downing their drinks.
One drink, three drinks, five drinks in and not a single person dropped. Two drinks later and some were having a hard time keeping their heads up. It took till the tenth drink for someone to finally fall over. Racknar, the only one standing instead of sitting, wasn't even wobbling a little bit. Five more drinks and half the table was taking a nap, Racknar was barely wobbling. Eventually by drunk eighteen it was just Racknar, the rude man, and the queen. The rude man grabbed a second horn and drank two at once while standing. “What trucks have you paid stanger?” He slurred before dropping to the floor. Racknar and the queen both downed two with the queen obviously struggling. “That's a good question. Imma berserker using rage and even I'm struggling.”
Racknar smiled. “That's easy. My constitution is higher than the normal max in addition to two separate instances of poison resistance. One from berserker and one from my race. I'm an arachnid beast-kin.” The queen stood and wobbled around. “Oh, that explains it.” She tried walking over to Racknar but fell to the floor. “I guess you win then.” She hiccuped. “You stupid sexy muscular spider man.” She passed out. Racknar looked around. “Let's all pretend she didn't say that last part.” He wobbled to a chair and sat hard. “Now that I've won, Imma take a nap.” Racknar then hit the ground with a loud thud.
Racknar awoke with a massive headache and found himself in a nice bed that was the only one in the room. He blinked hard a few times before the queen entered the room wearing a nightgown of sorts and holding a cup out to Racknar. “This should help with the hangover.” Racknar took it. “Thanks, but you didn't have too.” The queen did a light bow. “Oh but I do. I am so honored that you have chosen me.” Racknar squinted as he sipped the drink. It was bitter, but he finished it. “Choose you-?” The queen smiled. “To be the one that independent Bramble interacted with. And since I lasted the longest in addition to that the others all voted I was the best option for the new high king.”
Racknar nodded and gripped his head. “So I didn't black out and do anything… unbecoming?” The queen looked away. “You didn't even ask to. I'd be offended if it wasn't so soon after my husband's passing.” Racknar groaned. “It's weird just how many people in this world would share a bed with me.” The queen chuckled. “I’d have to place a wicker basket over your head, but besides your face you are not the worst to look at.” Racknar groaned. “I'll take that as a compliment. As soon as I've recovered, my party and I will head out. I must next stop at the continent of Alfheim to visit the Elven kingdoms.”
The queen bowed. “I'll make my leave then. I've got to prepare myself for a delegation with the Dwarf King.” Racknar nodded. “We actually finished up there not long ago. So feel free to say hello to him for me.” The queen bowed and left the room. Racknar waited a bit before getting up and gathering everything. “Alright Monster Mashers, I think we're done here. Another smooth diplomatic mission.” Ariagoria crossed her arms. “That shouldn't have worked. Don't spiders process alcohol differently than humans? You get drunk off caffeine.”
Racknar chuckled. “Yeah, it still impares me though. Luckily for me I raised my constitution and have multiple sources of poison resistance so I could drink even a Dwarf under the table. At the end of the day I was just better suited for the task at hand. For the Elven kingdoms it'll likely be Krys'tal and Marionette taking the lead. Archery and stealth. Though we'll be killing Lolith before talking to the dark elf queen. So I guess Arachne will do the heavy lifting for us there. Either way I imagine it going just as smoothly.” The party finished gathering those things, took a gate to the island they started on, then hopped onto a boat heading to their next location. On the way Racknar called Elizabeth to update her on another alliance successfully obtained.
