Jules was the most blunt and cut-throat woman I had ever known in my entire life. She was also insanely good at making pancakes.

  The sweet aroma of my guilty pleasure food filled our kitchen and dining nook. I smiled to myself as I worked on my laptop. Majoring in graphic design had proven to be a brutal choice. My next class was a late morning one, but in the following class I had a book cover project due. Despite the pressure to get it finished in time, my anxiety was easily overpowered by my body’s natural instinct; hunger.

  Jules had her hands full with pancakes on her left and a pan of sizzling bacon on her right. She was a wizard when it came to breakfast cuisine. All I could do was sit at the dining table and admire her work.

  “Hm, what would I do without you?” I asked with a cheerful sigh.

  “Starve,” She said with a laugh before looking over at me, her face scrunching up, “Wait what? Are you seriously working right now?”

  “Yes?” I said, testing it.

  “Sera! You can’t just be all work and no play, your mind needs a breather sometimes dude. We talked about this.” The tone of her voice, although unserious still held sincerity. I knew she honestly just meant well.

  My phone chimed for my attention, but I ignored it. I huffed, flipping it screen side down. I looked up at her face of concern.

  “But it’s due today Jules, I really need to get this done.” I countered, turning my attention back to my laptop screen.

  She sighed, “Fine, fine, you know I’m not going to stand in the way but please don’t forget to take a fuckin’ break once in a while girl.” Her eyes scanned over me as she set down a plate of fresh eggs and pancakes and a small bowl of syrup. Satisfied with her look-over, she smiled softly and went back to the stove to clean up.

  “I won’t.” I said sincerely, “Thank you for breakfast.” I ripped a piece of bacon apart with my teeth and sighed. Perfectly cooked, as always. I started scarfing down my plate.

  “Sure thing,” she said over the sound of running water and soapy scrubbing.

  Since Jules had already finished her own breakfast before cooking mine, she was cleaning up the pans she’d used and getting ready to leave for the day. We’d been going to the same college and living together for years, but we never had matching schedules or shared classes. It was really unfortunate honestly. I missed her brutal brand of humor in my day to day, she’d probably give some of my classmates a heart attack.

  “Oh, also made lemon pepper salmon for lunch, don’t forget to eat today.” She noted as she dried off her hands. Her bag and phone sat on the table next to me, ready for her.

  “Okay, drive safe!” I looked up from my laptop and waved.

  She was halfway out the back door of the kitchen when she looked back with a smile and threw a wink at me in response. I smiled to myself as she disappeared from view of the windows.

  I turned my attention back to the screen and picked at the last bites on my plate. It was just nitpicking at this point, moving the font spacing by two pixels, or adjusting the opacity by three percent. I sighed and saved my work, it’d waste more time than it was worth to anguish over every pixel the morning of. I was almost jealous of her choice to go for an MBA.

  You might be reading a pirated copy. Look for the official release to support the author.

  I closed my laptop and took my plate and silverware over to the kitchen sink. We’d been in college for several years, living together for even longer, but I’d be damned if I made her do all the work. Clearing the sink and putting away clean dishes was the least I could do.

  It was still a few hours too early to head to my first class of the day. I grabbed my laptop and phone off the table, making sure to push in my chair, and headed up the stairs to my bedroom. Jules and I had started renting out this townhouse at the end of our sophomore year of college with her dad’s help. It was nice having a safe, private space away from normal campus shenanigans while still being a short fifteen-minute walk away from everything. Our rooms and bathrooms, (thank fuck we each had our own,) were on the second floor. The first floor had our kitchen, dining half-room, living room, and a powder room which was super convenient.

  I set my laptop on my desk and plopped onto my unmade bed, contemplating changing back into pj’s for a couple extra Z’s. Nah, I’d definitely sleep through my alarms.

  I could not afford to miss my classes today. Instead, I pulled my phone from my pocket and rolled over, several unread notifications greeted me. I flicked through each of them before my eyes landed on a reminder.

  ‘Cassian’s Birthday!’

  My heart dropped.

  Had it already been a year? I thought to myself, counting out the months on each finger. Yeah. It’d been a year. I let my phone drop from my fingers and curled up into a ball, pulling my knees in for a hug. A full year. It’s the longest we’d ever gone without… talking.

  And suddenly, the air was too thick to breathe.

  It felt like the moment just before breaking the surface of deep water; lungs tight, chest aching, so close to air you could almost taste it. An unbearably heavy weight settled in my stomach as I squeezed my eyes shut. At the end of the day they were just memories, I tried to tell myself. Memories were just echos of the past.

  But he wasn’t just an echo. He was out there, still living and breathing.

  I sat up and pulled my fluffy white duvet tightly around myself. I looked around my room for grounding, my eyes landed on the dresser. A coffee mug and hoodie sat there innocently. The dark iridescent mug was practically sparkling from the morning sun, we’d bought it together at my favorite coffee shop. The once-black hoodie had a light gray cast from the dust that had accumulated, a memento he’d long since forgotten during our late night escapades.

  I turned my head and rubbed at my eyes, my hands each gripping a corner of the duvet. My bed couldn’t even escape the echos of him, afterall he’d picked out the ruffled white duvet cover and matching pillow shams.

  The corners of my eyes burned. I missed him. I missed Cass and it hurt.

  It hurt deep in my chest, what was usually a dull ache felt like the fresh wound I’d caused myself roughly a year ago. Cassian was my best friend. My partner in crime. The person on this earth that knew me even better than I knew myself.

  I sniffled and threw myself face down in the pillows. Desperate to choke back this feeling. What was wrong with me? How could I have done that to him? Was I seriously going to keep doing nothing?

  And above all today was his birthday… Fuck, I was such a terrible person. Did it really matter what he’d done? What justification could I have to just abandon him?

  Oh- Oh fuck, I’m spiraling.

  Hot tears started running down my cheeks. I ran my fingers through my hair, wishing I could untangle my nerves as easily as the knots in it. My shallow, rapid breaths did nothing to soothe me. Despite the sleepless nights and puffy eyed mornings where I’d promised myself I’d never contact him again, I had to do the right thing.

  Well, if there was ever a time I was going to do it, I needed to do it now.

  My trembling fingers found themselves wrapped around my phone. I held my breath as my fingers typed out the seven letters I’d been dying to string together and say to him all this time.

  Two words, seven letters. It was a simple text message, but I knew everything would change the moment I sent them.