THE NEW LIGHT

  Father was filled with love. Maybe that was the reason that he had so many lovers. He was visiting them with forms that would not make them afraid. And sometimes he was even tricking them to sleep with him. And at the end, each and every one of them was left with pain in their hearts.

  I could imagine if I were in his place with her. Green gaze with wrath, crying. How could I ever have done that to her? Her hands and legs were bleeding, and her lips were muttering my name. My true name. Apollo, how could you?

  Why are you hurting me? Why did you hurt the rest? Your lovers, your sister, your mother. You are the god of healing, and with each step you take, only death and sorrow erupt around you.

  ***

  My eyes snapped, with my heart beating faster than I could have ever imagined, with a strange liquid dripping down my spine. I tried to look at the night, trying to breathe. Why wasn’t I breathing? Make it stop, make it stop.

  ‘’Paris?’’Lyssandra woke up, and her cold hands touched my face.

  ‘’I…’’My voice broke, and I tried to look at her terrified gaze that was dressed with moonlight. Why was she scared? Did I hurt her?

  ‘’I am…’’I tried to speak again.

  ‘’It was just a nightmare’’Her voice was so soft against my ears, and tried to hug me.

  Just a nightmare. Why was there a nightmare? Why was he so afraid?

  Just a nightmare. Because she was still here, trying to calm me down. I wondered if she also was dreaming about the people she hurt. Maybe she had so many times, and now, it doesn’t bother her. Will I turn like that, too?

  ***

  When the sun rose, Lyssandra was about to get out of my grasp again and wrapped herself close to me. ‘’Sleep. Now. Write. Later’’ I mumbled, and she gasped for air.

  ‘’We need to be read-’’

  ‘’We are still on our honeymoon’’I reminded her and turned to me with a gasp. ‘’When did you learn about it?’’ She laughed, and I kissed her nose.

  Marcus told me. He didn’t like how much noise we were making, but here’’I showed her the room and then my body.

  She arched her brow and returned to my arms.

  ‘’That’s my Oracle’’I said, muffling the words around her lips. None could listen to us. None could watch us and expect something from us. There was no pressure as I was removing her garments and cupping her chest.

  But there were those words of Hector again coming to my mind. And I stopped, and Lyssandra faced me, curious.

  ‘’What happened?’’She asked, touching my face. I told her half the truth. That Hector was in her room, watching her, and what he told me. About the palace.

  She laid down to the bed and looked at the ceiling, looking as if she was scheming.

  ‘’The king can have many enemies as he now takes half of Italy'’She tried to think. ‘’But I think sneaking around the palace and the city will be better’’

  That was her excuse for snooping around, so no one else will bother her. Honestly, I liked the idea too. Might we also see the city better with no more insults from both of us.

  ‘’What else did he say?’’ She asked with a smile, and I tried to forget the comment he made at first. ‘’Was this why you had a nightmare?’’

  ‘’Maybe’’I admitted. I couldn’t tell her the dark void I saw on my slumber. And I thought that it was better for her to believe that it was about him.

  ‘’He said that you are beautiful’’ I kissed her cheek, and she smiled.

  ‘’I know that I am. What else?’’ She showed me her neck, and I began kissing it softly

  ‘’That if you were his wife, you would be locked up and well protected.’’

  And she scoffed. ‘’Did he name our children?’’ She kissed my lips, and I popped them

  ‘’No, but he wants a dozen.’’I moved my mouth down to her stomach and kissed it softly. ‘’All of them boys.’’

  ‘’Of course he does’’She rolled her eyes and threw her pillow at my face, and she stood up to take one dress from her closet. The king insisted on maids to assist us, but she refused, thinking that there would be more threats like the one at dinner.

  ‘’He is charming’’She noted as she took a few light blue fabrics for her to wear. ‘’And rich. I might think of his offer.’’ She let out a wide bow and jumped to her side.

  ‘’Will I be a consort for you then?’’I whispered to her ear, my fingers tracing between her thighs, making her let out a heavy gasp. There was the music I needed in the morning.

  ‘’If you keep like this, I will tell him to serve me your head on a silver platter’’She spoke clearly, and I got to my knees.

  ‘’So you like my head’’I whispered and kissed the inner part of her thighs. Her mouth held her deep breathing looked to her chest.

  ‘’They will want us to go for breakfast’How hard was she trying to hold her moans? It was so entertaining.

  ‘’I do not want to eat their rich breakfast’’I said and began feisting the one thing that I wanted the minute that I woke up. And it looked like she was feeling the same, too, as I licked the dripping honey from her thigh. I moved my lips higher, tasting her with each movement of my tongue, making her gouache out like a canary. Even when we were together, she was still trying to hide her pleasure by cupping her mouth.

  ‘’Use your hands for something else’’I said, popping one beautiful spot, and she let out one more groan.

  ‘’Or, I will stop’’And with that, she grabbed my hair and shoved my face to her thighs with her hips moving up and down and her voice singing like a canary.

  ‘’Finally,’’ I muffled and kept playing with her beautiful flower. My hands now grabbed her legs, and I tried to lift her slowly. She replied by wrapping them around my head, trying to suffocate me. Oh, I wish I could die like this. I thought, and I lifted her to the thin air and walked back to the bed with her. She let out her hands, trying to cover her mouth, but I stopped her and moved back to her mouth.

  ‘’Don’t’’I kissed her.’’You’’Again. ‘’Dare.’’ Again, and I moved my mouth down below with one hand touching her stomach and the other pulling her hair from behind.

  ‘’Dear go-’’She was about to say, but I let out a laugh. ‘’Now you want to pray?’’ I leaned back to her inner thigh and let soft kisses. First, Then, my fangs found her soft skin, and she let out all her pleasure for her trembling body, panting heavily.

  I lifted my body back to her, all grinning like an idiot as she was ready to doze off to her sleep.

  ‘’Honey.’’ I licked my lips. ‘’Moon.’’

  ‘’I hate you’’She panted and shoved her pillow once again to my face with her mouth going down between my legs.

  ‘’Wait, don’t you dare-’’I tried to say that I began singing too with her mouth and tongue on my member.

  ‘’You are worse than me’’She was muffled with her mouth full, and her hands moved on her breasts, pushing them between my member.

  And I covered my face with the pillow, holding everything. She instantly stopped and walked away. But I grabbed her wrist and tossed her back.

  ‘’No, do not leave,’’ I said, and showed what she started. She bit her lower lip, and then her gaze turned to me. ‘’Beg.’’

  I blinked, confused, and I took a deep breath.

  ‘’Please keep going’’ I whispered. And she laughed.

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  ‘’Louder’’Her voice sang with her fingertips touching my tip.

  ‘’Please, I need you’’My face turned even more red as I spoke those words.

  ‘’The gods can’t hear you.’’Her lips leaned closer to my mouth, and I stopped her by finally begging.

  ‘’Please, my Oracle, I need you to-’’’

  I didn’t even finish my begging, and her body jumped back to my member, now, and she started kissing me as she was riding me slowly. Both of our bodies were turning warmer as we were trying to make sure neither of us would be silent. I cupped her breasts once more, pinching her skin, and her hand grabbed my head again, forcing me to kiss her neck.

  ‘’You're so greedy’’I moaned, and she slapped my face.

  ‘’Stop talking’’She chuckled, but my hands moved back to her hips, slapping them, letting more screams of a beautiful song. How pretty she was around those tunes with her sharp, violent body now slowly melting like honey. And I wondered if I was looking like her when she was facing me.

  ‘’Tell me what you want Oracle’’I mumbled and pushed her body down to the bed.

  ‘’My riches? All yours’’I moved to her cheeks, but my teeth bit her earlobe, and her nails scratched my back.

  ‘’My body? Done’’I kept moving my hips, letting each note get out. I wondered if there were servants or guards listening to us. And for a moment, I wish they were listening, making sure they would shut up.

  And my hand touched her belly, pushing it with all my power as her eye was rolling back.

  ‘’My soul?’’I gasped out. Take it. Take everything and keep screaming. Keep hurting my skin as I try to outmatch your beautiful voice.

  She let out heavy breaths, and she covered her face.

  ‘’No no’’I said as I finally stopped moving my body. Why was I so lightheaded?

  ‘’Let me see you.’’

  ***

  There was a library in the palace which Lyssandra found pleasing as she kept reading for hours, as in secret, she was expecting the servants and guards. And so did I. Frankly, nobody was amused or disappointed that she was alive. Maybe they found out at night and had time to accept it, or that they were very good liars. She started playing, the lost girl, getting to the supposed wrong rooms, but she had every reason to be there and find anything.

  Until we both snuck inside the kitchen and the cooks kicked us out with both of us holding warm bread, cheese, and figs.

  She checked on the king, giving her her own medicine and throwing out the drugs the healers had given before. At that moment, she admitted that those drugs were actually very weak, making the condition even worse. I tried to help her too, showing her my own knowledge, and in the end, we made a drug powerful enough to heal an army with one drop.

  ‘’Take this one drop once in the morning’’She insisted to the king while Hector was outside. The warm king nodded and looked at our bags that were filled with food from the kitchen.

  ‘’They still won't allow you?’’He asked, and I turned to her. How many times did she sneak into the kitchen before that?

  It was finally time for us to look around the city. We even gave the food to the people who were begging for it, and I must admit. I actually felt a strange warmth around my chest when I saw those smiles appearing on their faces. Maybe helping people with no money in return was good. It was painful, though, when we were living in a palace with pigs that were feasting five times more for a simple breakfast.

  We stood in front of the temple of the new god now. I wanted to get in. I wanted to see what was so important to those people that I couldn’t see.

  The few steps inside put heavy pressure on my body. I could see paintings of people who were mortals, calling them saints. There was nothing godlike about it, but everyone was worshiping them, building tall, beautiful buildings for mortals. They had made mortals their protectors because they were wise and offered things. The music that was playing was soft, like an offering to them, and right at the center, there was a statue of a woman, holding her baby, wearing that strange necklace.

  There was nothing godlike or mysterious about it, and it was crushing my body to a pulp.

  They had made mortal gods. What does it make me now?

  The shop with the music instruments was an enticing treat after that terror, and I began to play the chords that they had. Each time, a melody was getting out that made everyone around me gasp from admiration. I then tried the pipes. Same thing. At least, they were admiring me like this. I could still play music. I could still do that. And Lyssandra could not help but smile.

  ‘’I won’t eat that’’I said, looking now at the deer stew she told me to eat, and was still smiling with her own stew.

  ‘’It’s so good.’’ She explained.

  ‘’Lyssandra, I am a deer.’’I reminded her, and she raised her brow.

  ‘’I have seen deer eating each other’s guts. You will be fine.’’

  That…was true, but I did not want her to win in that part, and I looked away from the enticing stew. Instead, she told the worker to give me roasted vegetables and glared at me with a grin.

  ‘’More wine please’’I said, showing my empty cup.

  We were on our way back when my gaze spotted a pyre. The voices around us were speaking about an incident in the east of burning pictures because people were worshiping the gods that way. And so, they tried to show it there too, priests throwing every painting or statue they could find while artists were weeping, looking at their works getting destroyed. One image caught my eye, as inside that pyre were also statues and masks that were familiar. People were worshiping me with masks like these. They were getting on their knees at the bottom of my statues. And I could see the ones that remained for centuries getting burnt like the ones before.

  I wondered what expression I was making for Lyssandra to hold my hand.

  She once wanted something like this to happen. But now, she could see that it was pointless. Because it wasn’t hurting only the gods. But mortals too. Artists, devotees, and children who still had hope in their eyes.

  ‘’Shall we go?’’I asked her, and she replied with an empty nod.

  ***

  ‘’I wanted to pray to you once’’She admitted as we were resting on the bed, and she was playing with my hair. ‘’Back when this country was still new, there was a version of you paraded all around. I wondered if this part of you could have listened to me. Reply, tell me that you are alive.’’She moved her body closer to me.’’I felt so weak. I felt that I was back to my pathetic self’’

  her voice was shaking.’’I did not want to pray, but I did…I didn’t want to-’’

  ‘’It’s alright’’I spoke to her softly and kissed her forehead, trying to make her sleep.

  ‘’I will go check the people, you rest.’’I said and kissed her lips.

  ‘’No, I will come with you.’’

  ‘’Oracle.’’I spoke dry, and she smiled.

  ‘’Godling’’ She snarled mockingly. It was so hard to resist her.

  We took turns that we couldn't take before. No guards at night in those places. Or even servants. Where were the people around?

  We found ourselves in front of the prison of the palace. The room had such a familiar scent that it was drawing me all around it. We both inspected the empty cellars that had a hideous stench. Why were we here? What were we supposed to find? It didn’t matter because at the end of the last cellar, Lyssandra stood there silent, completely frozen.

  Waking to see what she found was an empty cell with heavy, broken shackles and walls, letting only fear around it.

  He escaped. The king said to her. What was inside there? Hiding for centuries.

  ‘’Oracle who was…’’

  ‘’We shall go back’’She spoke, trembling. But I grasped her hand. ‘’Lyssandra, what was inside that place’’

  That makes you quiver like a mouse? That makes you turn to the person you know you hate?

  And her face was burning red in pain.

  ‘’I know that there was someone inside, I …’’I took a deep breath. ‘’I heard you and the king-’’

  And her face froze when guards approached us. What could we possibly say? What was the reason that we were standing there? If I had my powers, I could make us vanish. But they soon found us, and they drew the swords.

  ‘’Nobody is supposed to be here’’They explained.

  We both nodded, and we held each other’s hands.

  ‘’We got lost’’I said. ‘’We were drawn to each other’s eyes’’

  They did not buy it. Lyssandra was the better liar, but she was still frightened by those words.

  ‘’We are taking you to the king’’They said, and every torch now vanished for only darkness to appear. What was that?

  There was a growl around the walls, for everyone to listen to and get scared. This was the moment for me and Lysandra to walk away. There were screams and terror around the now dark halls, with the rotting scent of flesh approaching all of us. Why was afraid, why was afraid? What creature was this? What could it possibly be?

  ‘’Lyssandra?’’ I asked, and she held my hand. ‘’What is this?’’

  ‘’I don’t know…I didn’t see’’She said, and her voice kept being in fear with the growling closer to us.

  ‘’Let’s separate’’she suggested. And I held her hand tighter. ‘’I won’t leave you.’’

  ‘’You won’t leave me, you big reindeer’’She shouted. ‘’I will see you in our room, but now, it’s better to confuse him.’’

  And so, I nodded and let her hand go as we were running in opposite directions. I could listen to it coming to my side, the beast getting nearer. I stumbled to the floor with an object messing with my footing. I couldn’t move my ankle. I twisted my ankle. And it was painful. I moved to the object, only to realize it was a wet body. A bleeding body that was holding a knife in his hand. I grabbed it and moved left and right, still listening to the growling. Why was my body wet? Was that sweat? Why was my heart beating so hard? Why were my ears ringing? Why did I want to scream?

  The growl came now right a breath away from me and hit him with the sword as I shut my eyes.

  And then, I heard a painful sound. A painful mortal sound.

  Opening my eyes now, I could see Hector on his knees with bleeding arms and a face of confusion.

  ‘’What are you…’’He muttered and looked around, and so did I. How many fallen bodies. How much blood? And I was holding a sword.

  ‘’What did you do?’’