Chapter 58: LeapDay 68

  Ugh, my breath is terrible. That’s right, toothpaste! Alina worked for nobles, she must know about it.

  “Alina, why does my breath smell bad? I mean, how can I make it better?”

  “Oh, good morning, David.”

  “Of course, fake soap. It’s just sodium bicarb and saponins. Why didn’t I think of that earlier?”

  “What?”

  “Thanks Alina!”

  I made a batch of fake soap yesterday. It looked sort of icky, which is much better than extremely icky. I added a bit of charcoal and crushed mint. Definite improvement. Actually, it looked disgusting but smelled better. Pretty good results, even with a twig in pce of a pstic brush. I rinsed with vinegar, just in case. Not bad overall.

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  To take a break from the rigors of Curatar, I decided to take everyone to Nordselm’s 20th floor today. Sherry told us that we’d face Fly Traps, which I remember as being sensitive to fire magic. To keep away from the barfing Sarracenia and bothersome Hat Bats, it’ll be a magic-heavy floor. With map in hand, we warped directly to the byrinth and literally burned through the monsters.

  Suddenly, Roxanne called out, “Wait, I smell something. Master, there’s a rge group of monsters down that hallway.”

  “Can you estimate the number and are they all the same type?”

  “At least 10 Fly Traps. I’d have to be closer to be sure.”

  “Even if we could sneak past, I’d like to see them. We could always warp out if there’s too many. So, any objections, anybody?”

  Alina said, “As long as we can get away, it could be a good experience.”

  “Alright, Roxanne, tell us if the number jump sharply or if we might get surrounded. Everybody stay close in case we need to escape.”

  We snuck up to the area, found a small door and came to room with over 20 Fly Traps.

  “Wait back here and block until there are fewer. Sherry, watch my back and drag me out if I fall down.”

  I hit them with Fire Storm and feel a notable drain on my MP. Wasn’t too bad so I hit them again. The monsters were in such disarray that I gave the signal to jump in. I happily recovered some MP in the process.

  After clearing the room, no treasure lump or anything else special was found. Oh well, we had already finished half the floor and it was time for lunch.

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  After a quick check to make certain the area wasn’t crawling with nobles, we warped to the vilge. After dropping off some of our outer gear, Alina volunteered to fetch Bernhard and I took Roxanne to meet the children.

  With no hesitation, the kids ran past me to reach Roxanne. This certainly wasn’t a learned behavior — it had to be instinctual. I don’t know if it was her rge chest, eyes or just her gentle demeanor, but they somehow knew that she was safe and kind. Roxanne sat down and let them greet her, without understanding a word.

  Sure, the kids liked Alina too, but that seemed like simple familiarity. Of course, Alina could talk to them too. The kids were much more reserved around Sherry, who, in turn, seemed a bit suspicious of them. I guess a bit of the dwarf vs elf trope is to be expected, or she simply doesn’t like kids. I hadn’t really thought about it before, but the kids seemed to like the guys almost as much as Alina. These guys really do act more friendly than scary.

  I took Roxanne back and saw that Alina had found Bernhard and they were on their way. The rest of the party had pulled out the food and drinks so we joined them. As soon as Bernhard walked into the room, his eyes locked onto Roxanne.

  “Hello, friend Bernhard. This is Roxanne, our newest party member.”

  Roxanne stood up and shook his hand before returning to her seat. Bernhard still just stood there with his mouth hanging open.

  “Yes, we’ve met, but, um, I- I’m sorry, I’ve just never seen such rge ones before. Are you perhaps of the wolf-kin tribe?”

  “Yes, I am. Most wolf-kin have the smaller kind, but rge ears are common in my branch.”

  Bernhard sort of mumbled, “Wonderful.”

  I wasn’t really expecting such a reaction to that part of her anatomy. It’s good that she understood and handled it well. Hoping to steer the conversation away from physical traits, I pulled Bernhard’s attention back to me.

  “So, Bernhard, how have you been this week?”

  “Very good, friend David. We’ve completely recovered from the flood. Your help with the repairs and the recent good weather have saved us. I expect we’ll get a better harvest than usual.”

  “Happy to hear it. Any problem with monsters in the area?”

  “Only a few and we’ve been able to take care of them without anyone getting hurt. This year is actually easier than st. David, you should know that some soldiers came here yesterday.”

  “Were they nice or mean?”

  “Neither really. They didn’t stay long and they mainly asked about you, David. I told them that we hadn’t seen you recently and that we didn’t know when you might return.”

  “Good. Please make sure to always be honest with them. If they return, it’s perfectly fine to tell them I was here. I’m just here to visit a friend, after all.”

  “OK, I’ll be sure to do that. I was also given some sort of official invitation regarding Lady Rutina, but I don’t really understand what it’s for.”

  “Shall I?”

  He handed me a card which announced Rutina’s investiture. I seriously doubt we taught him words like that and I don’t know if he knows how to read.

  “Bernhard, this is an invitation, or rather, a summons, for you to attend the ceremony for Lady Rutina to become the new Count of Selmer. It will be held at the castle just after the Summer Holiday. You’ll be expected to bring a small gift and there will be a big dinner afterwards. The county will send Adventurers to provide transportation for vilge chiefs.”

  “Will you go too, David?”

  “Unlikely since both the duke and duchess are unhappy with me. I don’t want to get in the way. I’ll go see her afterwards.”

  I really didn’t want to be introduced as the person who killed the previous count — he may have had some retives who actually liked him. The st thing Rutina’s ceremony needed was to have me challenged to a series of duels.

  Before we left, I asked Theo to pull out some of the fancy beef we’d picked up recently.

  “Bernhard, please accept this meat as a gift. We’d love to stay and help you eat it, but it’s time for us to get back to work.”

  “Oh, this is wonderful. Please take some mead with you, as our gift in return.”

  Sherry gracefully volunteered to carry it and we warped back to complete the floor. We gathered quite a lot of ingredients for strengthening pills (MP recovery) and Alina recovered a Carnivine skill crystal for MP absorption. I could be really frivolous and use it on my dagger or actually save it for something useful. If nothing else, we could enchant a spear and sell it. Hmm, I wonder if we’re expected to give Rutina a present?

  After the boss room, we warped home. Despite being pretty tired, Sherry didn’t utter a word of compint about the extra load strapped to her back. She smiled broadly while putting away the new cask, damage-free.

  Before bed, Sherry enchanted a pair of gloves with poison resistance and gave them to me. Expecting a reward, she had a reasonable helping of mead. Well, reasonable in dwarf terms.

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  Day 69

  I wake up with Sherry sticking close to me. She really does have a high body temperature. I guess it makes sense considering the terrific strength she musters in her petite body. Of course, she’ll get offended if I ever call her petite since she’s so sensitive about her chest size. Maybe she was already uncomfortable with Alina’s medium frame, but I must admit that Roxanne’s proportions are notable. Well, all I can do is reassure Sherry that I like her just the way she is. Fortunately, it’s true.

  “Good morning, Sherry. Any lingering effects from the mead you drank st night?”

  “No, David, none at all. It’s just sweet water, after all.”

  “Good. I got a bit concerned when you started snoring.”

  “What? I don’t snore.”

  “OK, must have been someone else.”

  “Grr.”

  “Nah, I was just teasing.”

  “Really?”

  “Yep, it was definitely you. Let’s go down for breakfast. You probably woke everyone else up anyway.”

  The others saw Sherry ‘lightly’ punching me in the arm on the way down. They pretended they hadn’t seen anything and I subtly cast heal on myself.

  “Good morning, everybody. Today we’ll start an entirely new tier, which, in a way, is a repeat of the first tier. The bosses of the first tier will be the normal monsters on these floors. Of course, the old bosses will get new bosses of their own and now there will be two of them in the boss rooms. The good news is that we’ll start this new challenge against the kobold boss, the, um, ‘kobold camper’, or something like that. It was a while ago and it’s a weird name anyway.”

  Alina mumbles, “?Kamper?, huh? So the kobold bosses speak Elvish, just like Jakob.” [1]

  “The bad news is that the monsters of the previous two floors will be there too, like usual. We’ll still have to fight Drive Dragons and Rock Birds, which will now be stronger by one floor. The maximum group size is still at six, as it will be for a very long time.”

  Sherry points out, “David, a Kobold Kampfer is not weak in combat. They’re only weak to magic.”

  “Good point. I shouldn’t underestimate them just because of the name. Anyway, let’s pn on two days per floor. If this gets to be too much, we’ll slow down even further.”

  Roxanne asks, “Do we need to be this careful?”

  “Hopefully, I’m being a bit too cautious. But, since few parties progress this far other than well-financed nobles, I don’t mind taking it slow.”

  Alina and Sherry support this policy while the guys just shrug.

  “By the way, I’ll go to the merchant guild at lunch today. It’s been a week since I st visited my contact and I hope he’s found some nice crystals for us.”

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  We warped to Curatar’s 34th floor and started fighting. As expected, it was a little easier than the 33rd floor. The magic-sensitive ‘campers’ are the most numerous and they’re easier than golems. It’s funny that there aren’t more parties here as a result. Still, it wouldn’t be a terrible idea to drop back to the lower floors a bit more often. Repeating the boss fights can be both fun and profitable.

  I dropped the party at home for lunch and went to the merchant guild to see Luke. For the very first time, this normally reliable merchant wasn’t there for my completely unscheduled visit. How inconsiderate. Grumbling nonsensically like this to myself, I made my way towards one of my favorite warp spots to join the others for lunch. Just before leaving, I noticed a carriage speeding down a crowded road in my general direction. It was far enough away to be no danger to me, but others could be hurt. With this situation now getting my full attention, I saw that a little kid had fallen in the street, directly in the carriage’s path.

  The horses don’t seem panicked so the primary danger will be the carriage itself. Specifically, the left-front wheel is less than 20 meters from the kid. I quickly cast a Breeze Wall a bit in front of the horses at an angle to encourage them to avoid the child. Using Overwhelming, I sprint forward. The horses are tough enough to deal with the air, but they certainly don’t like it. They veer off as intended and I reach the kid just in time to scoop her up — well, the wheel missed her position by half a meter. The carriage ends up tipping a little from the abrupt change of direction. I don’t hear it crash, but it does seem to be stopping.

  “Are you alright?”

  The child cries in Elvish, ?Aah! I’m sorry. I’m sorry.?

  I respond in broken Elvish, ?It is alright. You is safe.?

  She looks terrified — being grabbed so forcefully may have the worst part for her. It’s hard to be calm for the kid with some jerk yelling in the background. It’s coming this way, so it’s probably something I’ll need to deal. Nearby, I see a kind-looking woman with a concerned look. I call out to her.

  “Hey, you there. Yes, you. Please come here for a moment.”

  The woman quickly comes to take the frightened child and I turn my attention to the speed demon coming towards me. He’s yelling something, but I’m louder.

  “Hey! What the hell is wrong with you?! Slow down you maniac!”

  “Watch your tongue. Do you know who I am?”

  Great, yet another jerk who expects everyone to recognize him, or just has amnesia. Identify shows him to be [Oswald Aneste]. No title so let’s have a pissing contest. I summon Durandal under my cloak and pull back just enough to reveal the hilt.

  “Yes, Oswald, you’re the man who almost killed an innocent child. Would you like to know who I am?”

  Seeming to understand that escation might not be in his favor, Oswald responds, “The child is unharmed. This matter is closed.”

  He tosses a few silver coins and hurries back to his carriage. Sure, I’m still angry but I manage to calm down and return to the woman and frightened child. It looks like the kid has calmed down a bit, despite the yelling.

  “Thank you, ma’am. Sorry to put you on the spot like that.”

  “That’s quite alright. You were just worried about your child.”

  I turn to the little girl and say, ?My name is Dawit. Me help you mother to find. Yes??

  ?Dawit? Yes, thank you. Mamma is at the store, but I got bored.?

  ?Want woman to help??

  ?Yes, Dawit, your woman is nice.?

  “Ma’am, the child would feel more comfortable with you. Would you mind helping me find her parents?”

  “Isn’t she yours?”

  “Nope, never seen her before. My name is David, by the way.”

  “I’m Mirable and yes, I’ll come with you.”

  We walk to the nearest food store to see a frantic elven woman outside. I hand them a couple of silver coins (not the ones off the ground) and send them on their way.

  “Thanks for the help, Mirable.”

  “I was happy to, David.”

  “Um, could I possibly take you out to dinner?”

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  [1] David’s mistake of saying ‘camper’ sounds more Elvish than the modern High German ?K?mpfer? (fighter). This is shown as ‘Kampfer’ in the HUD. It seems that diacritics tend to be dropped rather than transliterated.