Ci didn't sleep. She honestly might've gotten more sleep on that dreadful couch. But her embarassment and guilt worked hand-in-hand to weigh anything but her eyelids down, and her sore muscles from the previous day didn't help. She felt like the ceiling was spinning as dawn cracked through the windows, knowing she'd likely be spending the next day running off delirium. She had been pushing down the shame of what she had done. She had escaped, she was free, learning to live a new life. But nothing was certain.

  How long would she stay here? What would happen to her if she got caught?

  ...What happened to Jamie...?

  She groaned over her aching body and turned on her side, facing Remora who's back was to her. Ci huffed and cmped her eyes shut, trying to capture even a single minute or two of shut-eye. Then of course, like Remora sensed it in her sleep, the peasant girl rolled over, draping her arm across Ci.

  Ci felt her nerves jolt and her body freeze apart from the pounding organ in her chest. She looked at Remora with open, wide eyes and a blush crept up on her face.

  No. Nope. Nuh-uh.

  Ci slowly turned over to her other side, moving quietly to not wake Remora. With a meticute hand, she plucked Remora's hand by her wrist, moving it to take it off her body. Ci huffed, sliding across the bed to try and get up. Again, as if Remora sensed it, the peasant girl groaned with a pout, and her arm moved to wrap around Ci, snatching her up in a hold. Ci yelped in a whisper as Remora pulled Ci into her body, effectively spooning her. Ci squirmed to release herself, but Remora had a grip on her.

  "Great Gods, this woman is strong..." Ci thought to herself, feeling the firmness of Remora's bicep that constricted against her side. Ci wrestled to escape her grasp, but the more she moved, the more Remora unconsciously restrained her. Realizing its futility, Ci fell limp against the mattress, just letting it happen. Remora sighed softly, rexing into her.

  So much for the free peasant life dream... She escaped being a prisoner to someone else's bed, only to end up one in a completely different way.

  Ci sighed, turning over to face her again, a scowl on her face. She looked so peaceful and rested, which only made Ci groan grumpily. But for some reason, she couldn't be anymore angry beyond just a bit of sourness as she looked at Remora.

  Ci had to admit... she was pretty. Pretty like Jamie. Ci always admired the female peasants even before Remora. Even before Jamie. She never understood it well though... She only understood that she was different. Where princes and suitors should have been charming and attractive were actually revolting... When other princesses she'd mingle with expressed their distaste and snobbish comments about the looks of peasant women, Ci couldn't understand it... She hated the excessive amounts of makeup, the bulgy jewelry, and the above-all-others act. Ci thought they were just jealous of peasants. They had such natural beauty, they were diverse in features, and all had different personalities and presentation.

  And Gods, that day she met Jamie she was helpless. The best kind of helpless. Not the kind she was now.

  ...

  "I think something's wrong with me." Marina admitted, tossing a pebble into the sea below. She sat by the cliffsides just outside the castle gardens in her royal ballgown, her shoes and crown tossed carelessly to the side. Jamie sat beside her with a curious smile.

  "I think nothing is wrong with you." Jamie replied. Marina met her eyes with a scoff.

  "Then there must be something wrong with you too." Marina quipped back. Jamie chuckled. Marina adored her ugh, especially when Jamie found her sharp tongue and attitude to be charming, whereas her mother would strike her for such use of nguage. Jamie sighed, rubbing her arms as the breeze drifted over her.

  "Perhaps you have a point... Us spending time like this is very... not approved of." Jamie rolled her eyes, her head tilting down. "Which... I'm still attempting to understand why you'd bother to spend time with a lowly servant girl... and risk getting in trouble all the time." Jamie frowned. Marina let out a short, defiant ugh, bumping her with her shoulder.

  "Hey, before I met you, I was getting in trouble all the time anyways. I think it's finally wearing down my parents." Marina tilted her head up proudly. Sure, none of the things she ever got in trouble for were ever really worth it, but now... she couldn't care less. Something about Jamie was worth it. Jamie groaned.

  "I don't want to be the cause... I don't want you to feel like you need to take pity on me and be my friend just because I'm lonesome. It's not in your priority to care for the affairs of individuals like me. And I don't want to see you getting punished on my behalf..." Jamie turned her head away. Marina felt her heart tighten, and shifted closer to her. Marina reached her finger up to Jamie's chin, tilting her head back to look at her.

  "I'm not doing any of that. I'm spending time with you because I enjoy being your friend. Because I'd rather be around you than any priss and pompous royal..... bitch." Marina smirked as Jamie gasped at her profanity.

  "Your highness...! That's not very dy-like..." Jamie jested, breaking a ugh out of Marina.

  "Lady-like? Where? I don't see anybody dy-like around here...!" Marina lifted her hand over her eyes, scanning the terrain around them. Jamie giggled at her antics, Marina smiling with her. As their ughs subsided Marina's gaze softened upon Jamie. Jamie met her gaze, then suddenly recognized something in her eyes. Something that yearned to be satiated. Her heart suddenly started pounding and her chest tightened as she watched Marina's eyes drop to her lips.

  "Jamie..." Marina whispered. Jamie felt a tingle run up her spine and she had to swallow a thickness building in her throat.

  "Y...Yes...? Marina...?" Jamie replied with a waver in her voice. Marina's eyes darted from Jamie's eyes to her lips in a triangle shape that caused a hot feeling to stir inside the servant girl.

  "There's something incredibly wrong with me..." Marina's voice dropped to a low sound as her face hovered closer, her eyes half-lidded. Jamie blinked at her as her face grew feverish.

  "Oh...?" Jamie's eyes dropped to Marina's lips. Marina hummed with a nod.

  "Is there... something... incredibly wrong with you too?" Marina inquired with a pleading look as she met Jamie's hazel eyes. Jamie felt a recognition hit her as she knew what Marina was asking.

  To Jamie, she didn't understand it either. But it was there. She was scolded for her behaviors as a child... behaviors like drawing two girl characters together from books she'd read, pying with her dolls wrong, and when inquired about a crush, she'd answer that there was none... though that sometimes was far from the truth. She pushed it down all her life and built up walls of iron and steel. But Marina, like a phantom, seemed to simply float straight through them. Jamie felt her brain buzzing as her blood pumped rapidly.

  "I... don't know... maybe you should find out..." Jamie whispered back. She didn't know why she said it, but the words just fell out of her. She couldn't help her body leaning closer, her gaze mirroring Marina's half-lidded one. Jamie could faintly hear the princess's breath shaking as she exhaled and her breath ghost her lips.

  Then without another moment, the princess kissed her.

  Fireworks and harmonies ignited and sang within Marina, like everything finally fit into pce. It was a million times wrong but so singurly right. Jamie's lips were soft like a summer peach and the faint moisture between them was addicting. Marina brought her hand up, cupping Jamie's face in it. Jamie whined softly against her mouth before pulling back, meeting her eyes.

  Their hearts were rapid like a hummingbird's, and the buzz inside and all around their bodies was electric.

  "Oh my Gods..." Marina excimed breathlessly, her eyes shimmering with ecstasy. Jamie let out an airy ugh, covering her mouth. "What did I just do...?" Marina pnted her hand over her head as her world spun, a smile still pstered on her lips.

  "I don't know..." Jamie added, her face feeling like a thousand degrees as she covered it in her hands. Marina looked upon her with such infatuation, though a small amount of panic began to correspond with her already existing adrenaline.

  "Oh, Jamie... I'm sorry, I don't want to drag you into any of this... I know that was stupid of me... This is so risky and stupid and-"

  "Oh my Gods, shut up for once." Jamie interrupted her, pnting her lips on hers and barreling her over onto the grass.

  ...

  Ci's eyes opened with a frustrated huff. She didn't realize in the midst of her half-sleep-half-daydreaming that she had curled up closer to Remora. And worse, Remora was looking right back at her with those damned hazel eyes. Ci peeped and shifted away, turning on her back. Remora smiled.

  "Morning, your highness." Remora teased. Ci hummed weakly in response, and Remora immediately clocked her withdrawn state, softening. "Hey... You alright?"

  Ci wanted to lie... lie like she had been doing for the past week and then some. But something in her was far too tired to muster the act up. She let out an exhausted, defeated sound, turning her head away. Remora frowned.

  "Didn't sleep well...?" Remora propped herself up on her elbow. Ci shook her head. Remora sighed, then smirked, nudging her.

  "Don't tell me... Do I snore?" She quipped. Ci turned her head with an anxious expression.

  "What? Oh, no! No, not at all!" Ci quickly affirmed. Remora chuckled sleepily.

  "That's a relief..." She said with a light tone. It did nothing for Ci's mood, and her smile faded once more. "...Bad dreams?" She softly inquired. Ci shook her head. "...Just feeling restless?" Ci nodded slowly. Remora observed her, noticing the circles under the girl's eyes and a clear sadness inside them, letting out a thoughtful sigh.

  "You can talk about it to me you know..." Remora offered. Ci's brow furrowed and she turned her head. Remora smiled as their eyes met. "I may not know anything about your life or what it was like... but you've been working hard to understand and learn the ways of ours... so the least I can do is listen... If you need a way to get it off your chest." She reassured, her eyes blinking slowly.

  Ci felt a warmth soak into her chest. A warmth she had grown to fear, but only because she knew how completely and utterly helpless she was to it. She fought so hard to make sense of it, or to bury it, or to meet it with reckless abandon. Now, she just let it seep as she sighed and faced the ceiling.

  "The day of my wedding... I was caught with..." She bit her tongue, the words "my bridesmaid" resting against her teeth. She swallowed it down. "...another". She admitted. Remora's eyes widened partially, but she shifted closer, her full attention on Ci.

  "It was reckless. It was hopeless. A part of me knew it would never fully work. I knew we'd get caught eventually..." Ci sighed, sitting up. "I've been a troublemaker as you would call it... probably my entire life. No matter how many times my mother would strike me, or my father would send me to bed hungry... No matter how many detentions, etiquette lessons, cruel tutors, or just the total brainwashing of it all... I just couldn't be fixed. Tamed. I grew so used to it. I grew so used to my behaviors getting me hurt that I'd just... continue being wild. And then... He came along..." Ci's fingers clenched around the fabric of her sleeves, her knuckles turning white.

  "The prince...?" Remora gently inquired. Ci bit down on her lip as it trembled.

  "The things he said to me. Those... vile, ugly, threats that made my skin crawl, and that I knew were far from empty. But that wasn't even the worst part..." Her jaw clenched as tears started to form. Remora listened with patience.

  "It was that someone else got in trouble. Someone I cared about, someone I-" She shook her head. "Someone I loved. And I don't even know what happened... For all I know that someone could be... locked up in some cold dark dungeon somewhere... or worse..." Ci's voice cracked as that mortifying thought entered her head. She covered her mouth with her hand as her eyes gleamed and tears began to rush out.

  Remora quickly sat up, wrapping her arm around Ci's shoulders and rubbing her gently.

  "And I left... I just left... I abandoned it all because I'm... so incredibly selfish. Untamable. I can't be broken in and because of that I'm so terribly broken..." Ci wept, curling into herself. Remora released a breath, pulling Ci into her arms, running her fingers through the girl's chopped hair as she thought of how to reply. She then smiled.

  "Then, I think you'll fit in fine here, Miss Wivret." Remora whispered. Ci tipped her head up, seeking expnation. Remora smiled wider. "Oh yes... We Monagrails have always been misfits. You know, Babcia in her youth, she once was arrested for spshing hot coffee in a guard's face when he made crude advances." Ci's eyes widened.

  "What? You're kidding." Remora chuckled and shook her head.

  "It was how she met my dziadek. He worked at the pace ever since he was a boy. Fell in love with her at first sight and broke her out." Ci gasped at her words. There was a glint of pride in Remora's eye, and she gave Ci a reassuring shake.

  "So what if your a misfit? So what if you ran away? We all do things in this world to survive. You were forced into a situation, no, a life you didn't agree to. It's not selfish, it's survival." Remora affirmed. Ci listened to her, but dipped her head. She still couldn't shake the guilt. "Your lover, was he... of lower css?"

  That singur pronoun made Ci's chest tighten. She clenched her jaw, and nodded.

  "A servant..." Ci replied quietly. Remora smiled.

  "I think you'll find us servants and peasants... we're all very challenging to be rid of. I'm sure he's alright..."

  Ci sighed. She wanted to believe it. She wanted to imagine Jamie was fairing... Maybe Remora was right. After all, Jamie might have been as delicate as a dove's feather, but she had a spirit to her that Ci always adored.

  "And I'm sure if he loved you just as much, he would have wanted this for you. He would have wanted you to survive." Remora held Ci's shoulder with a confidence in her voice. Ci sighed.

  "Why does love have to be so terribly undoing...?" Ci leaned into Remora. Remora rested her head atop Ci's.

  A strange feeling started to fester in Remora's stomach. It swirled and rose to the middle of her chest. It was heavy and dark, a hideous green color. She couldn't understand it. Remora imagined it brewed because she had never empathized so deeply with a royal before...

  But no... She knew it as envy. But envy of what?

  Perhaps Remora wished she had a love that lived in her like that.

  Perhaps she felt jealous that Ci had found that love.

  But definitely not because that love had found Ci. That would be nonsensical. She was broken from these thoughts when Ci spoke again.

  "I feel so incredibly helpless..." Ci dropped her head onto her knees. Remora frowned.

  "Love... can be undoing... but it also is what makes us strong... It gives you strength to get up... to hold your ground... or to run... You're doing something no other princess has done, I can assure you. You're trying to make some kind of difference for yourself... That's not helpless, Ci. And I promise... you won't feel that way for long..." Ci looked up at her as her gaze gleamed.

  "I won't...?" Remora chuckled and shook her head in response.

  "Hell no. Not with the Monagrails." Remora nudged her, causing a small chuckle to escape Ci. Remora smiled, a warmth filling her soul."How about... I tell Babcia to make you one of your favorites today?" She offered. Ci looked up at her with puppy dog eyes.

  "Chocote chip cookies...?" Ci whimpered. Remora smiled and nodded.

  "Mhmm... Come on..." Remora took her hand, helping her out of bed. Ci followed with a sparkle in her eyes.

  Today she'd be undone... But tomorrow, perhaps a little more mended.

  It takes time.