Inn charters issued for out of settlement establishments shall not be granted should any of the following conditions be met:

  1) Inn compound is within 1 half day's walk of a settlement of size 2 or smaller.

  2) Inn compound is within 1 full days walk of another chartered inn situated outside a settlement of any size.

  3) Inn compound lacks appropriate safety measures commensurate with their surroundings. See circular 2.3B for regional safety requirements.

  4) Inn compound lacks suitable stable space for burden animals (up to brox) equal to their customer rooms (all staying customers should have space for their animals).

  5) If overnight camping is allowed, a dedicated space of adequate size per cart is provided within the confines of the inn compound.

  Out of settlement inn compounds are to be checked annually by surprise audit of at least two separate auditors. First infractions will result in a warning with subsequent infractions resulting in monetary fines. Note: establishments must be given adequate time to remediate infractions prior to second audit, to be less than three months plus one additional month per day travel from nearest settlement.

  -Excerpt from Merchant Guild Guide: Inns, Taverns, and Taphouses.-

  Moira's left ass cheek still stung as she walked home from the bathhouse. Joe's blow had more excitement than aim and it had landed off kilter, causing the sturdy blacksmith to lose her footing and fall back into her assailant. He'd caught her, but the two of them still ended up going backwards into the bath where she almost drowned the big oaf. Soft apologies and delicate neck kisses had eventually soothed her. She even allowed him to help her dry off, a task he was more than willing to do.

  Her hair was still damp as she turned the last corner and saw the fist fight in progress. Gretta stood defiantly blocking the base of the stairs to the Fairchild residence. She was covered in bruises. Dark green blood oozed from a split lip and a cut across her eyebrow. One of her apron straps had torn loose, causing the heavy leather garment to flop down in front of her. She was panting, clearly exhausted, but holding her ground nonetheless.

  Her attacker looked no better, despite his fur likely covering a good number of bruises. Minsk panted just as hard as Gretta. Both shirt sleeves had been torn at the shoulder as well as at the collar. One eye was in the process of swelling shut and blood flowed freely from his own split lip. The two had apparently taken a moment to breathe as neither was moving when Moira had spotted them. She picked up her pace to intercept the pair before hostilities could commence once more.

  It was Gretta who saw her first, since she was facing outwards towards the street. The young orc gave a snort and pointed back over Minsk’s shoulder. “Well you’re in fucking trouble now. The boss is back and I can’t wait to watch her finish kicking the shit out of you.”

  By the time Minsk had turned to look, Moira had already made it to the shop. The stout woman didn’t even bother going around to the opening, instead planting a palm down on the nearest table and using it as a pivot to leap the table of wares. She almost landed on a two pound sledgehammer. The ground inside the shop's work area was littered with tools and raw materials, the fight having apparently ranged the length and breadth of the shop before it ended at the stairwell.

  Moira fixed her former lover with an icy stare. “What the hell is happening here?” She demanded, stomping over to confront the much larger C’tahl.

  Minsk didn’t back down at her approach. Instead brushing himself off as best he could and treating the smaller woman to his own glare. “I came to see my daughter and your employee refused to let me do so.” The words came out as a growl that rumbled deep in his chest. A younger, much more naive part of Moira’s soul remembered feeling that rumble against her skin and for a moment her breath caught in her throat. The rest of her, older and much wiser, told that part to shut the hell up and went back to being angry at the cad.

  “My daughter,” Moira growled back, pointing to herself as she took a step towards Minsk. “I raised her, I cared for her, I was here.”

  “And you’d deny her the chance to get to know her father? I should be allowed to see my own blood.” Minsk took a step forward, forcing Moira to look almost straight up to see his face. Moira wanted to bawl him out, to scream at him to just go away. They had been doing just fine without him and clearly if he’d actually cared he would have been there to watch his daughter grow up. But she didn’t, she knew he would always find a way to turn it into her fault, to somehow make himself into the victim instead of taking responsibility for the mistakes he’d made. Instead she chose to meet his haughty indignation with calm reasonableness. Not because he deserved it, but because she knew deep down it would frustrate him.

  “She may be your daughter Minsk.” Moira’s voice was level and calm, but she refused to take a step back and give ground to the looming man. “But Gretta has been in her life far longer than you have. She’s practically Sarah’s older sister and Gretta is very protective of her. You shouldn’t have come over unannounced.”

  “And you definitely shouldn’t have just tried to push past me.” Gretta added from her place covering the stairs.

  “Go back to your room, clean up and come back. I promise you, you’ll be able to see Sarah then.” Moira said, bringing Minsk back to her before he could round on Gretta. “And in the future, please let us know ahead of time that you’ll be coming by.” She raised a hand to forestall Minsk as he opened his mouth. “It’s not so we can deny you seeing her, it’s to make sure we’re not going to be somewhere else when you come by.”

  “If you were not here, I would just go looking at your playmates house.” Minsk shot back. Before she could respond, Minsk spun around and stormed off. He only slowed to give Gretta a glare on the way by. The young orc threw up a rude gesture in response before turning to Moira. “Sorry, he just showed up and tried to push past me. He said he ‘was never barred from going in before and wasn’t about to be now.’”

  “That’s a lie, my mother used to kick him out all the time.” Moira came over and looked her assistant up and down. “Do I need to go to Joe’s for anything?”

  Gretta shook her head. Using her thumb, she wiped the blood away from her lip before scrubbing at her forehead with the back of her hand. “Nah, it’s already closing. If I need to, I'll just stand out in the sun a little.”

  The pair ascended the stairs as close to side by side as was possible in the narrow confines. “Did Sarah come out?” Moira asked as they rounded the bend.

  “No, thank the gods. She was up here working on her reading last time I checked.” They entered the living space of the Fairchilds only to find it devoid of life. “Huh, she was sitting on the couch.” Gretta muttered, pointing to where the little girl's work book could be seen tucked into a cushion. The girl in question though, was nowhere to be seen.

  “Sarah!” Moira called out. Irrational fear gripped her heart as Moira tried not to conjure a hundred different horrible ideas that could have happened to her daughter while she was gone. Had Minsk snuck in in the brief period they'd been talking downstairs? Had Sarah panicked at the noise and climbed out a second story window? She took a steadying breath, trying to get a grip on her frayed nerves. When no response was forthcoming, Moira looked in the most logical place she could think of.

  Sarah wasn't in her room. Nor was she hiding under her bed, or in the armoire in the corner. Moira paused as panic welled inside her again. Dammit girl, she thought to herself, where the hell are you?

  “Found her!” Gretta called from Moira's room. The orc's head popped around the corner a moment later. Moira couldn't help noticing that her split lip and bruises were already fading. “She's under your bed and won't come out.”

  Moira moved into her room and took a knee by the bed. Leaning down to look under, she could just see the top of Sarah's head peeking out from behind the thin wooden crate Moira used to store spare blankets. “Baby,” Moira spoke softly to the scared girl. “Can you come out? Everything's ok now.” Moira opened her arms. The little cat girl slunk out from under the bed and straight into her mothers embrace.

  <><><>

  “I think that's a wonderful idea.” Becky had her back to her employer, focusing all her attention on the extraction she was working on. Joe didn't mind though, as the moz was perfectly capable of holding a conversation while being engrossed in something else.

  “Are you sure? I don’t want to leave you all on your own if Higgins is still giving you trouble.” Joe himself wasn’t working on anything at the moment, having just gotten back from his impromptu date with Moira.

  Becky pulled a face like she’d just bit into the world's largest lemon. “He’s…still causing me problems when I’m out and about, but he won't set foot in the store if Goober is around.” She shot the aforementioned mooch a loving smile as he snoozed nearby. Goober lay sprawled out on his back in what Joe referred to as “full roach mode” and was totally oblivious to their presence in general and Becky’s comment in particular. As they watched Goober gave a violent twitch in his sleep followed by the quiet sound of leaking gas.

  “Aw hell no, I’m going upstairs until that clears.” Joe said, pushing off the counter he’d been leaning against and holding his breath as he passed the gnollhound. Becky was trapped by the necessities of her work and couldn’t escape the invisible death slowly oozing towards her. She shot Joe a pleading look before he disappeared up the stairs.

  “Hey remember you have weapons practice with me tonight!” She yelled up the stairs before being swept up in a coughing fit. “Gods above Goober, did you eat the ass out of a mimic?”

  Despite Joe’s reservations about leaving Becky alone while she was dealing with a stalker, he couldn’t help but start to plan out what he’d need to do for the upcoming trip. I’ve been in this new world for a few months. Joe thought as he fished around in Goobers rank bedding for his stach. It wouldn’t hurt to get out there and see some of the world, and with Moira coming I’ve got a guide. Just watch what she does and do that and maybe I wont stick out like a sore thumb. Retrieving the old pillowcase Joe kept most of his money in, Joe dumped the contents out on the dining room table. An absolute shower of coins cascaded out, most of it being the pay out from the mana blaster that he hadn’t used to stock the shop.

  I’ve got more than enough to rent some sort of cart for us to travel in. Do Two Brother’s rent just brox, or can I get a cart from them too? I’ll have to look into that. Moira says Southgate is four days away. Is that four days walking, or four days riding? Better assume it’s riding. I’ll need to pick up enough trail food for at least six days then. I can resupply in Southgate for our stay and the drive back. Joe had been the planner when Mary and he had gone on vacations, so he naturally fell into assuming he would be responsible for coordinating and purchasing even if Moira would reimburse him later.

  Joe was torn from his mental calculations a moment later by the loud bang of the front door rebounding off the wall. Silently he crept to the edge of the balcony and looked down into the shop floor. There he saw a sight that warmed his heart; Minsk looking absolutely chewed on.

  The C’tahl’s shirt was ruined, being both torn up and speckled in dried blood. Presumably said blood had been his, as there were obvious signs of damage around his mouth and one eye was swollen almost shut. Minsk stomped across the shop floor before stopping at the counter directly below Joe.

  “Healing potion, grade 2.” He growled out to Becky. Joe could hear the thunk of meat on glass as Minsk presumably dug out his guild license and slapped it onto the counter. He would have needed to present it any time he bought grade 2 potions, but Joe had already run into quite a few veteran adventurers that tried to throw their weight around and refuse to show him their license. This small act of decency kept Joe from heckling the mauled adventurer about promising to not buy his potions.

  Stolen from Royal Road, this story should be reported if encountered on Amazon.

  Instead Joe silently watched the quick exchange as Becky retrieved the requested potion and broke a gold for Minsk, who apparently hadn’t had anything smaller. Joe was still standing there at the banister when Minsk tipped his head back and swallowed the potion right there at the counter. Their eyes locked as Minsk knocked back the bottle and the C’tahl glared up at him, the swelling on his eye already going down.

  Joe broke the silence between them with a quick nod. “Hope it helps,” he said in a flat tone. Minsk didn’t respond. Instead just setting the empty bottle on the counter and turning on his heels. He did shut the door with slightly less force than he’d used to open it though, which was something at least.

  <><><>

  Planning for a trip, even in a fantasy world, is no easy task and it took Joe and Moira almost two weeks to get everything together. In that time Minsk had made another three appearances. Apparently the beating he’d gotten from Gretta had finally gotten it through the stubborn C’thal’s head that things had changed, as his behavior improved with each visit. He was still frosty towards Moira and absolutely frigid with Gretta and Joe, but he didn’t let his feelings show in ways Sarah would have noticed.

  After the initial shock, Sarah was just happy to have a father again and the little catgirls guileless excitement likely had a lot to do with Minsk’s thawing. Moira had even consented to the two spending unsupervised time together and Minsk had taken Sarah for a “lunch date” with just the two of them.

  On the day of departure Joe took everyone, including Minsk, out to breakfast to celebrate the beginning of the trip. The meal had been pleasant, if strained, and almost everyone wished them well as they headed out onto the open road.

  Joe had splurged a little, well more than a little, with the cart they had rented for the trip. His rationale had been that if they were going to spend at least six nights sleeping in it, he wanted it to at least be pleasant. So he’d rented Paule’s vardo style wagon. It was painted red with yellow trim and had an honest to gods feather bed in it. Joe almost cried. The interior was the same red and yellow as the exterior and in addition to the feather bed had a small cast iron stove, a fold out table and a smaller bed just big enough for Sarah. A pair of brox came along with the cart, as well as a small bundle of firewood for the stove. Joe still brought along an ax and saw just in case they needed more.

  Joe had to admit to Moira that he had no idea how to drive a cart. This had earned him more than a little teasing before she took the reins, both figuratively and literally. Joe sat beside her on the little bench seat and listened as Moira explained how it worked. By the time they'd stopped for lunch, Joe felt confident enough to take over for a while.

  The land around Academyway was hilly and dense with trees, providing a shaded canopy over the trio as they traveled. They had chosen to picnic next to a stream in a spot where the road had widened out. Joe and Sarah decided to soak their feet in the icy water as they ate the sandwiches. The meal was simple but pleasant, accompanied as it was by bird song and the sounds of insects buzzing in the trees.

  Joe could have stayed the whole week right there, but they had a destination to get to. Still, he thought as he watched some inquisitive minnows nibble his toes, it's good to know there's a spot this nice so close to town. We can make overnight camping trips out here pretty easily. Joe wasn't sure if camping for pleasure was something that was done in this world, but he was willing to give it a try.

  His eyes were drug down to where the handshaker sat by his side. Moira had insisted he bring it, equipping herself with a wicked looking disc mace. Then again, if things are dangerous enough to need to go armed, maybe your average person doesn't want to be out in the wild for fun. I'll ask Becky when we get back, Moira's already looking at me funny.

  That night they camped just inside the wooden walls of a roadside inn. This was apparently common enough for the inn to have a specific open area dedicated just to overnight guests wishing to sleep in their carts. Besides these camp sites, the space within the walls held a long two story inn house and a stable which sold brox feed and stabling space. The walls themselves were constructed simply of whole tree trunks driven into the ground and held firmly together by horizontal wooden struts.

  Joe’d let Moira do the haggling while he stayed with the cart. Once he’d gotten the go ahead he pulled their little camper into the roped off spot she indicated. There was just enough space for a cart their size, plus a bit extra presumably meant for outdoor activities. One of the two other spaces was occupied by another traveling group. A family of kobolds, a parental set plus eight children, watched as Joe did his best to get their obstinate brox to cooperate backing into their camp site.

  Once Joe was done, the flashier of the two adults, presumably the male, jogged over and helped him set the stop wedges into the wheels.

  “Good evening,” the little kobold tittered, bouncing from foot to foot as Joe straightened up. “Are you coming or going from Acadamyway?” Unlike Cha’takal, who was the only other male kobold Joe knew well, this one was mostly covered in bright yellow feathers with a splash of green around his eyes, neck and tail tip.

  “Um, coming from.” Joe responded, taking the kobolds miniscule hand in a careful shake. “Joe Alderbright. I’m the chemist there, but we’re off to see family so I’ll be gone for a few days.”

  “Pity,” The brightly colored kobold responded. “We are in fact going the other way for the same reason. My mate’s brother helps at the pawnshop there and we are coming to see their first clutch of children. Do you know them?”

  “Oh Cha’takal? Yeah, I live next to him.” This still unnamed kobold was even shorter than Mi’takal and looking down to talk to him was making Joe feel like he was looming over the little guy. Eventually he settled on sitting on one of the wheel hubs of the cart. It doesn’t look like he’s going anywhere so I might as well get comfortable.

  “Darling!” a new, somehow higher pitched kobold voice cut his conversation partner off before he could get going again. The male kobolds head whipped around so fast at the sound Joe was surprised he didn’t hear a crack noise.

  “Yes my flower?” he called back to where Joe could see the other adult kobold waving to get their attention. Unlike her mate, she was a drab green brown that would have blended in well to any of the trees around them had she not been wearing a white dress with a leather vest.

  “Please let the nice man get settled in Darling. Their brox look tired and hungry and you know how they can get." The kobold called Darling reached up and rubbed at his head absentmindedly where Joe could see a bald patch in the male's feathers. He ducked a quick bow at Joe, “terribly sorry, when you’re all settled in why not come by the wagon for a proper meeting? Bring something to eat and we’ll feed you.” At which point the little kobold practically evaporated as he turned and covered the distance back to his mate.

  “Well,” Joe said to no one in particular, “I see it’s not just Cha that acts like that…”.

  When Moira got back Joe explained what had happened and after she showed him how to unhitch, feed, and secure the brox without losing one of his fingers, she set about making something to take with them to the kobolds. Despite having now lived in his new world for months, Joe was still wary of the giant chicken cows. Having Moira help him get them settled cemented his dislike of the animals firmly into place.

  His instinct that they were only barely domesticated brutes turned out to be true, as on two separate occasions while feeding and tying them off Joe had let his concentration lapse and he’d had to duck a thrusting strike of their beak. They’re less chicken/cow and more cassowary/bear he’d grumbled privately while finishing off the knot that was meant to hold the beasts to the wooden stake overnight. Why they didn’t just use their razor sharp beak to cut through the lead he wasn’t sure. Maybe leather just doesn’t bleed enough for their liking.

  Moira ended up making a sweet porridge dessert halfway between a custard and tapioca. It was studded with nuts and dried fruit that had been soaked in brandy. The whole affair had then been poured into the nicest bowl Moira had brought along before being drizzled with spices and honey.

  For the dinner portion of the meal the kobolds had roasted fish fillets in butter and herbs over a bed of coals. This was served with a side of fennel looking bulbs steamed in their own leaves by the simple expediency of thrusting the wrapped bundles into the fire and pulling them out when the outer layer had charred black. The fish was rich and savory, while the accompanying vegetables added a citrusy note that made up for the lack of lemons.

  Joe had been surprised when the children had been allowed to eat some of Moira’s dessert despite the alcohol soaked fruit, but Moira had assured him that there wasn’t enough alcohol in it to hurt the kids. With very few exceptions, the soak fruits were discarded by the children anyway so it really wasn’t that much of an issue.

  The meal was an informal affair, eaten while everyone sat around the fire on low log rounds. The children scarfed their own meal down as fast as they could before running off to play in the inn yard. The only rules they were given were to stay within the wall , away from the brox and be back at the camps by nightfall.

  “Be back before the streetlights come on.” Joe’d muttered to himself behind a forkful of steaming fish. While the children went off to explore the inn yard, the adults sat and ate much slower. Food as good as this was meant to be savored and they intended to enjoy it to the fullest while swapping life stories back and forth. Joe found out that the female kobold, a one Jan’Hithrow, had actually been there the day that Cha’Takal had met his future mate. She corroborated a lot of what Joe’d been told about that day, but added in the more embarrassing bits he was sure her energetic brother had wanted to forget. Among Joe’s favorites was the one where Cha’Takal had become so excited about being allowed to work at the fruit stand he’d lost track of who he was talking to and started to try and sell fruit to Mi’Takals own mother.

  The only rocky spot had come late into the conversation when Jan’Hithrow had made a tittering little comment about how cute “their” daughter was playing with her children. Moira had to explain that Sarah was “her” child, with Joe being a recent addition to the family. Even with that, Joe still felt warm to have been included in their family at all.

  “Aw, well I’m glad you have him.” Jan’Hithrow had said, her face falling for only a brief moment. “The two of you look very cute together yourselves.” She gave another titter, covering her smile with the back of her hand. “Perhaps in the future the two of you will have a child you can share.” Moira had reddened while Joe’d choked on a fruit. Thankfully the conversation veered into safer topics shortly after that and the awkwardness was swiftly forgotten.

  Sarah was exhausted by the time the children returned and it was all the two adults could do to get the sleepy little cat girl out of her play clothes and into her pajamas before she fell asleep. Moira had to enlist Joe’s help to support Sarah while her mother got her dirty pants off and slid her into a soft woolen replacement. Once Sarah was safely tucked in bed and out cold, the two of them changed into their own sleeping clothes and retired to the much bigger bed in the rear of the cart.

  Since their bath date, both of them had become a lot more relaxed about their bodies around the other. Moira hadn’t bothered waiting for Joe to turn around before removing her shirt and chest wrap, which was good because Joe himself didn’t bother to turn away. He didn’t so much sneak a look as buy a ticket and watch the show. His open interest in her body drew a smile from the blacksmith.

  Still shirtless, she turned around and flexed her arms causing all the muscles along their length as well as those on her back to bulge. Looking over her shoulder, she gave Joe a big wink. Joe chuckled at her display, trying not to be loud enough to wake Sarah up.

  “If you’re expecting that good of a show from me, you should ask for your money back.” He whispered as he pulled his own shirt up over his head. The difference between his body and Moira’s was stark. While weapons practice with Becky had hastened the demise of his pot belly, Joe by no means had the sort of muscular definition Moira had.

  “I think you look fine Joe.” Moira said with a soft smile on her lips.

  “Nowhere near as good as you.” Joe shot back before blowing her a kiss. The two of them slid into bed and Joe was not at all surprised when Moira slipped in under his arm. While they had not slept together much, on the few occasions they had she seemed to prefer cuddling into his side. As a lifelong side sleeper, it was difficult for Joe but he stoically bore it to make her more comfortable.

  “Thanks for doing all this Joe.” Moira mumbled into his side as she got comfortable.

  “What? Coming with you?”

  “That and helping pay for it. We have the money, but travel is so expensive and there’s just so much planning.” Moira looked up and lightly kissed him on the lips. “Just, thank you for helping me do something I should have done a long time ago.”

  “You’re welcome.” Joe responded before the two of them snuggled down into the warm bedding. Joe eventually drifted off to the light sounds of her snoring.

  <><><>

  Morning saw them on their way bright and early, although not as early as they had intended. While they had plenty of trail food to get to their destination, Sarah had insisted on having breakfast at the inn before they left. Being in no particular hurry now that they were a stone's throw from the end of their own trip, the Hithrow clan had decided to join them for breakfast. Which was how Joe found himself sitting around a large wooden table with ten rowdy kobolds learning a frankly bawdy song that the pups apparently knew word perfect.

  Moira had of course banned Sarah from singing the song, which only encouraged her.

  The sun was well and truly up by the time Moira and Joe had hitched the brox back into place and gotten back on the road. “If we eat on the run.” Moira had explained while Joe tried to remember which hand held which rein, “we can make it to another inn before it gets dark.” Joe had wanted to ask if inns were regularly spaced like that on purpose, but was smart enough this time to know how odd of a question that would be. Instead he gave a soft grunt and wiggled the reins in a hopeful manner. The brox, compelled likely more by pity than anything else, began a slow plodding walk that would eat up the miles.

  The road wound them deeper into the forest. The trees on either side growing steadily grander as they went. Eventually the boughs above them fully enclosed the road and they traveled along a light green tunnel listening to the sounds of birds and small animals. Beneath the forest giants the ground was carpeted with large ferns and sticker plants that heavily suggested staying on the path. Occasionally they would come on a section of the road that had required the shaving of a small hill.

  Joe always made a point to study the exposed rocks and tool marks left behind by the work crews. From the long scratches, Joe guessed they had broken the stone up by hand with pickaxes. I wonder if a spell big enough to carve out this much dirt and stone is just too cost intensive to be a viable option. He thought as they passed a fairly respectable cliff face that was scarred with uncountable numbers of tool marks.

  It was a remarkably peaceful morning all around, right up until Joe came around a bend and spotted a fallen tree laid out across the road about thirty feet in front of him. “Shit,” he said with feeling as he heard the unmistakable sound of people moving through the undergrowth behind their wagon.