Elise exhaled sharply, gng around at the giant spiders crawling over the rooftops. “Alright. What are we going to do?”

  Garron’s grip tightened around his sword. “There are still vilgers in their homes. We ’t leave them.”

  Elise raised an eyebrow. “Who said anything about leaving them?”

  Matra sighed. “We ’t leave them. But there’s no way we take down the Empress.”

  I frowned. “Why ’t you just shoot the damn thing?”

  Matra gave me a dry look. “That’s not how it works. I was k at best ba my adventuring days.”

  I blinked. “And the spider?”

  Matra gestured at the vilge entrahat thing is easily B-rank.”

  I crossed my arms. “So…?”

  Matra scowled. “So I ’t take the damn thing down. It would take at least ten ks to do that.”

  I groaned. “That’s just great.”

  I gnced around. “I’m guessing we don’t have ten ks in the vilge?”

  Matra smirked. “Nope.”

  I threw up my hands. “Then just leave. Why worry about everyone else when we should be w about ourselves?”

  Elise’s expression darkened. “You’re hopeless.”

  She motioo the side. “Go.”

  I blinked. “Wait… what?”

  Elise shrugged. “If you want to leave, then go.”

  I looked between her and Matra. “This isn’t some trick, is it?”

  Elise rolled her eyes. “Nope. But there are probably baby spiders crawling around, plus the adults, and, of course, the Empress.”

  She smirked. “If you make it through all of them and survive, then you’ve got the devil’s luck.”

  She tilted her head. “Especially when you ’t level up or anything.”

  I swallowed hard.

  Yeah. That was… a problem.

  I took a small step bad ughed weakly. “You know what? You’re right. There’s strength in numbers. I was just kidding about leaving.”

  Elise smirked. “Uh-huh.”

  Garron shook his head. “Me and the uards mao kill five of the adults before the Queen showed up.”

  Matra’s brows furrowed. “We’re lucky she didn’t chase you here.”

  Garro out a harsh breath. “She spat acid that melted them down to the bone. We were caught off guard.”

  I squinted. “How did you survive?”

  Garron g me before looking away. “…I was outside the range of the attack.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “So… lucky?”

  Garron gritted his teeth. “I had no choice but to leave.”

  I snorted. “You mean run away.”

  Garron’s jaw tightened.

  I shrugged. “No shame in admitting it.”

  SMACK.

  I stumbled forward, rubbing my head. “Hey! That hurt!”

  Elise lowered her hand. “Then don’t be an asshole.”

  Garron exhaled. “He’s n, though.”

  I grinned. “See? Even he agrees!”

  Garron’s eyes hardened. “Which is why we make a stand here. We fight together.”

  I waved my hands rapidly. “Nope! Don’t e draggio this, Mr. Runaway.”

  I poi myself. “I’m here food time, not a long time.”

  Matra grumbled. “We take care of the adults, but the Empress will be an issue.”

  She turned back to Garron. “How many adults were there?”

  Garroated. “…At least twenty. Not including the ones I killed.”

  Matra nodded. “Alright. We hahe adults.”

  Theuro Elise. “You focus on killing the babies while making sure everyoays inside.”

  Elise nodded.

  I frowned. “And what about me?”

  Matra’s expressihtened. “Your job is super important.”

  I squinted. “I don’t like the sound of that.”

  Matra grinned. “Don’t worry. It’s easy.”

  I took a small step back. “What. Is. It?”

  Matra smirked. “All you have to do is provoke the Empress and lead her away.”

  I gawked.

  Then, without hesitation—

  “FUCK THAT.”

  I threw up my hands. “I am not being bait for anyone!”

  Everyone agreed that Matra’s pn was genius.

  Everyone except for me.

  They even voted on it.

  Three to one.

  But luckily, the only vote that actually mattered was mine.

  So, I said no.

  Which meant they had to e up with a new pn.

  A better pn.

  …Or so they cimed.

  That’s how I ended up running for my goddamn life through the vilge.

  The pn?

  Take some of the dead spider’s blood, spsh it on me, and then leave.

  Apparently, that was the biggest "fuck you" you could give to spiders.

  Because now, I had a whole swarm of baby spiders chasing after me.

  And just to make things worse—

  SPLAT.

  I felt something hot hit my arm.

  I screamed.

  Because holy shit it hurt.

  I barely mao gnce down before realizing—

  One of those little shits just hit me with acid.

  “The elder said it would only sting!” I yelled.

  I gred down at my arm, where the skin had turned red. “That’s a bunch of baloney!”

  That crap burned.

  And to really top things off?

  There was an adult spider chasioo.

  I turhe er, ducked behind a building, and pulled up my marketpce.

  “Alright, alright—what the hell was that I Death thing I saw earlier?”

  I quickly searched for it.

  I Death – 50

  I hit buy without even reading the description.

  A small metal grenade dropped into my hands.

  I blinked.

  I tur over.

  It had “I Boom” written on the cord.

  A grenade.

  Like… an actual grenade.

  I thought about it for one sed.

  Then pulled the pin and threw it at the oning horde of spiders.

  The grenade exploded—

  Releasing a thick green gas.

  I watched closely.

  Waited.

  Anticipated their horrible, gruesome deaths.

  …Except nothing happened.

  The spiders kept charging.

  I gawked. “What the fuck?!”

  Then the adult spider reared back—

  SPIT.

  Acid melted through the wall I was hiding behind.

  I quickly dodged out of the way, cursing.

  As I ran, I brought up the description of the I Death.

  I Death: Releases a poisonous gas that instantly kills all is nearby. 100% guaranteed or money back.

  I froze.

  “…Then give me my money back.”

  Wait.

  Wait.

  I looked back at the swarm of spiders.

  Then at the I Death description.

  Then back at the spiders.

  “…Are spiders even sidered is?”

  As I ran, I quickly searched for “spider” in the marketpce.

  A bunch of spider-reted items popped up.

  Spider traps. Spider repellent.

  A Spider-Man e.

  With a discimer that said:

  “Powers Not Included.”

  I spped my face.

  Then I finally found it.

  Raid Super Max: Spider and Scorpion Killer – 200

  I clicked the description.

  Releases a powerful agent that will kill any spider or scorpion in raargets will die within seds.

  I grinned.

  Sold.

  I hit buy.

  I was running for my life, fully expeg the worst.

  Then—plop.

  A tiny ass dropped into my hand.

  I stared.

  I blinked.

  This was… smaller than a damn travel-sized deodorant.

  I looked at the bel.

  Raid Super Max: Spider & Scorpion Killer Powerful Agent – Instah!

  Instah, huh?

  I gnced behind me.

  The swarm of baby spiders was closing in fast.

  The adult spider skittered behind them, acid dripping from its fangs.

  I swallowed hard.

  “Alright, you little bastards,” I muttered.

  I held up the , pressed my finger on the nozzle—

  AND SPRAYED.

  A fine mist shot out—

  And immediately the first spider shrieked—its legs curled up as it colpsed, spasming.

  The one behind it choked, twitched, and flopped over.

  Then another.

  And another.

  In a rea, the baby spiders started dropping.

  I stared.

  “…Holy shit.”

  This actually worked.

  Then I checked the .

  And froze.

  Because I had already used half the damn thing.

  I whipped my head up at the giant adult spider.

  It did not look pleased.

  The thing reared back, about to spit another round of acid at me.

  “OH HELL NO—”

  I dove to the side, rolling behind a pile of half-rotted wood.

  The acid spttered right where I’d been standing, hissing as it melted through the dirt.

  I peeked over my cripping the tiny, pathetic spray in my hand.

  “Alright, big guy,” I muttered. “Let’s see if this really works on you.”

  I waited.

  Waited.

  Then—SPRINTED FORWARD.

  The spider hissed, legs tensing to pounce.

  I jumped to the side at the st sed—slid u—

  AIED THE REST OF THE SPRAY RIGHT INTO ITS FACE.

  A horrible screech filled the air.

  The spider vulsed violently, legs spasming as it stumbled backward.

  Then—just like the babies—its legs curled in.

  And then?

  It flopped over. Dead.

  I stood there, panting.

  The spray dropped from my fingers.

  I stared at the dead adult spider.

  Then at the tiny on the ground.

  “…I just killed a giant monster spider… with bug spray.”

  I slowly grinned.

  “Oh, I’m so going to abuse this.”

  I stared at the dead spiders littering the ground.

  Then I opened my marketpd quickly sold them off.

  Baby spiders sold for 25 each.The adult one? A nice 45.That brought my total bance right back up.

  383.50 ? 578.50

  Which was just enough to buy another .

  …Actually, screw that.

  I bought two.

  578.50 ? 178.50

  I held up my brand new Raid Super Max s, shaking them menagly.

  Then, with a wild grin, I bolted toward the vilge.

  “LET’S GO, BITCHES!” I shouted.

  I was ready to exterminate every spider in this goddamn town.

  Then, just ahead, I spotted Elise.

  She was jumping over a cart, two giant adult spiders chasing after her.

  I skidded to a stop.

  Serves her right.

  I turned in the opposite dire.

  Except—

  The two spiders ged course a after me instead.

  I stared.

  “What the actual fuck?!”

  Then, it hit me.

  I was still covered in spider blood.

  I groaned. “FUCK!”

  The spiders lunged, and I dashed off, weaviween buildings, dodging, rolling, and dug behind anything I could find.

  Then, as one of them closed in, I spun around, raised my —

  And grinned.

  “Say hello to my little friend.”

  SSHHHHHHH—

  The mist sprayed directly in the spider’s face.

  It shrieked, twitched, seized up, and then flopped over.

  Dead.

  One down.

  I turo the sed.

  “Your turn, buddy.”

  SSHHHHHHHH.

  THUD.

  Another o the dust.

  I exhaled, twirling the in my hand.

  Then, out of the er of my eye, Elise stepped out from behind the cart.

  She stared at me like I had just summoned God himself.

  “What in the world was that?” she asked.

  I griossing a into the air and catg it.

  “The power of spider death.”

  Elise eyed the tiny in my hand.

  “…How?”

  I shrugged. “I dunno. It’s got a bunch of ingredients, and it says to keep it away from children and to call 911 if it gets in your eye.”

  I grinned wider. “Told you my skill was a cheat.”

  Elise squinted. “Uh-huh.”

  Then she held out a hand. “ I have one?”

  I immediately clutched the s to my chest.

  “No. Go away. This is mine.”

  Elise sighed. “Dan. We take down the Empress.”

  I blinked.

  “Oh, we probably could.”

  I shrugged and tossed her the .

  “Have at it.”

  Then I promptly turned my back.

  “I’m not doing that. I’m keeping myself safe.”

  As I spoke, I quickly sold off the two adult spider corpses.

  178.50 ? 268.50

  Elise watched the spider bodies vanish, raising an eyebrow.

  “Your skill is… really strange.”

  I nodded. “Yup. And everything is overpriced.”

  I cpped my hands together. “Now. You should go kill that Empress and save the day. Be the hero you always wao be.”

  Elise nodded. “Right. Also…” She hesitated. “Sorry about the spider blood thing.”

  I grinned. “Don’t worry about it.”

  I absolutely wasn’t thinking about a way to get back at her.

  Totally not.

  Elise narrowed her eyes.

  She looked at the .

  Then at me.

  “…Yeah,” she muttered, and then hahe spray bae.

  I blinked. “Wait. What?”

  She smiled. “I don’t want it.”

  “…Why?”

  She crossed her arms. “What if it’s empty?”

  I clicked my tongue. “Damn my big mouth.”

  Then—

  A scream rang out.

  Followed by a massive crash.

  A building colpsed, wood splintering as something enormous moved through the dust.

  I turned.

  And my jaw dropped.

  A massive spider—bd red—emerged from the wreckage.

  Elise stiffened beside me.

  I slowly exhaled.

  “…Well, fuck me sideways.”

  Elise took a step back. “Yup. That’s her.”

  I ched my tiny-ass .

  “…I’m gonna need a bigger .”